Put It Into Practice [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

If you follow the lyric of Van Morrison’s song, Comfort You, all the way through, it works a perfect circle: when the weight on your shoulders is too much, I’ll be there. When the weight on my shoulders is too much, you’ll be there.

When the power went out on Friday morning, with temperatures falling, a blizzard on the way, and the power company nowhere in sight, we did something that reminded me (again and again) how extraordinarily lucky we are. We texted friends to tell them that we were in a possible untenable situation. Their responses? Come stay with us. Do you need anything? What can we do? Questions of comfort and offers of support. Throughout the dark night and into the next day they regularly checked-in with us. We never felt alone or without a safety net.

It matters. When you’re sitting in the dark wearing layers of clothes beneath your coat, a single candle lighting the room, the circumstance is not dire when there are friends offering a warm bed or making sure you have what you need to get through the cold night.

It matters. When the power company arrived just before the storm, when they told us that they couldn’t reconnect our house because the downed tree that snapped the power pole that yanked the power-mast on our house, bending it beyond repair – and we had only a few minutes to find an electrician who would come-right-now on a late Saturday afternoon in the snow and replace a power-mast before the power company left…an urgent call to friends produced three possibilities. The new mast was installed not a moment too soon.

We are lucky. We have extraordinary neighbors. We have extraordinary friends. We share the weight.

And it left me wondering what is so hard to grok. A storm that takes out the power reduces all complexities into obvious simplicities. We all do better when we share the weight. We can get through any adversity when we show up for each other. We recently witnessed it on a grand scale in Minneapolis. A nation is no different than a neighborhood, when we share the weight, when we show up for each other – rather than exploit each other – there is no hardship that we cannot endure. In fact, we thrive in difficult circumstances when we have helping hands at the ready, when we know that we can count on each other to show up for each other.

The challenge facing our nation is not red or blue, it is a manufactured divide. It is the powerful elite, The Epstein Class, exploiting the people for personal gain. They get a massive tax break and we lose our rights and our social safety net. They need us to believe that we exploit each other, rather than support each other, so we do not see how they exploit us. The guys who showed up in the snow to set a new pole and bring power back to the neighborhood were not concerned about who we voted for or where we worship or the color of our skin; they were concerned about whether or not we would freeze through another night. They made sure that we were taken care of. With our neighbors, we stood on our porch and applauded them when the lights came back on.

My thought on healing this sadly distracted and falsely divided nation? Listen to Van Morrison’s song. And then put it into practice.

read Kerri’s blogpost about COMFORT

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Milestones and Munchos [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

Just in case you thought we were a classy couple, this image ought to dispel you of any illusion and knock us off the swanky-pedestal. Munchos and red wine. A classic combination.

This is actually an image of a celebration. The purpose of the celebration must remain undisclosed for national security reasons but in case you scrutinized the photo and are alarmed at the obvious daylight – and are worried that we began our celebration before noon or even before breakfast, rest assured that spring is approaching, the days are getting longer: we tipped our glasses at a reasonably late hour. By any sensible measure we were solidly in the happy hour zone when the vino met the Munchos. Dogga will attest to our appropriate start time. He is also a fan of Munchos though remains a teetotaler.

Some of my favorite celebrations in life did not happen in upscale restaurants or with linen napkins. They did not cost an arm and a leg. I will forever cherish tater-tots for the memories they invoke. Remembrance of biscuits and gravy at 3am, the clinking of coffee cups is a treasure. A baguette and white wine by the fountain. The extraordinary in the ordinary. Celebration of life with what’s at hand.

We constantly remind ourselves in this time of the world-gone-mad, not to miss the moments of celebration, not to let the horror-of-the-moment blot out the warmth of the sun. Did you know that the name Chickadee is onomatopoetic? I did not. Chick-a-dee-dee-dee! We opened the door so we could better hear the Black-capped Chickadee serenade our celebration.

We achieved a milestone. It could not have been better commemorated than with birdsong, Dogga at our feet, while we crunched a salty snack (the entire bag weighing less than 4 ounces!) and toasted life with a glass of red wine.

***

Once again, a post written prior to the latest outrage and act of titanic corruption. A war of distraction. Or, follow the money. Either way it is indefensible and unconstitutional though, we (I) might as well admit that the republicans and maga-minded have no use for the constitution (or critical thinking) as they daily throw it away.

Still, our blog post sentiment remains true: do not miss the opportunities to celebrate what is good and right amidst our national suicide-by-stupidity.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE CELEBRATION

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Come In Empty [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“In emptiness alone can there be creation.” ~ Krishnamurti

Horatio reminded me of a fundamental lesson in actor training: come in empty.

The great actor/director James Edmondson once told me that the art of acting is the art of presence. What is presence if not full availability, without need to achieve or to force action or to manipulate anything? Stand empty in a moment, open to all possibilities.

Saul the tai-chi master taught his students to look beyond the “obstacle” and place their eyes in the field of all possibilities. No resistance. No story. No need. More than once he said to me, “Let the energy move you.” Don’t fight. Don’t push. Relax. Empty.

We are cleaning out our home, emptying closets and shelves, and have more than once affirmed to each other that we are opening space to “allow the new to come in”.

Our candlelight walk through the woods was transformative. I stepped onto the path with a very busy, very distressed mind. As we walked my anxiety slipped away. The stars became more important than the thoughts raging in my mind. I quieted. We quieted. The woods came alive – or we – I – came alive in the woods. When I stepped onto the path I was tired. As we completed our second loop, leaving the path, I felt rejuvenated. Enlivened. Empty mind.

As we came around the corner of the Pringle Center on our way back to the car, a row of pine trees caught us. They were glowing. The light cast from the center combined with a crystal clear night made them shimmer. They beckoned. Kerri took their portrait saying, “Photographs can’t capture the light. They don’t do them justice.” She put away the camera and we stood for a moment agog at the glow, enthralled by what we’d passed-by merely an hour before, unnoticed.

Awe. Ever present and available when coming in empty.

HOPE on the album THIS SEASON © 1998 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE TREES

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Making and Unmaking [David’s blog on KS Friday]

Barney-the-backyard-piano is disintegrating. His shiny facade has long since faded and now peels away, revealing the underlying layers. Those, too, are fragmenting. The textures of a lifetime exposed and made beautiful in contrast. The story of his making fully revealed in his unmaking.

We spread birdseed on Barney’s lid so he plays host to the black-capped chickadees and cardinals. The squirrels sun themselves on his disintegrating keyboard. His keys are almost unrecognizable, a comment my grandmother once made about her hands. “Almost unrecognizable,” she said and laughed, holding her hands to the light. She marveled at her translucence.

On a rare day of warmth, we sat in front of Barney in black plastic Adirondack chairs soaking in the winter sun. Dogga circled the yard barking at the gusts of wind. “This will carry us a long way,” I said, feeling the warmth reach all the way to my bones. She nodded. There is certainly more winter to come.

I closed my eyes and was suddenly lost in thought about the tears-in the-rain monologue: “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe…All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.” Someday I will hold my hand up to the light and marvel at the story of my making revealed in my unmaking.

PEACE on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about BARNEY

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Once Again Walk [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

What is the truth of it? It is the question of our times, isn’t it?

We walked this path through our beloved Bristol woods a million times in the past. Always in the daylight. Rarely at sunset. Since they built a ropes course that cut through a significant portion of the woods, a course that draws rowdy crowds, we stopped hiking there. Too many people. Too much noise. We walk our trails to get away from the chaos. We mourned it.

A candlelight Valentine hike enticed us to return to our woods. We signed up for the latest possible slot, knowing there would be less people later at night. We almost didn’t go. We felt exhausted from the day. We ran through our list of reasons why we should stay home but rallied, tied on our boots, and drove to the woods.

The Pringle Center at the head of the trail was buzzing with activity. People who’d finished their trail walk made valentines, ate cookies and drank hot tea. We passed through long enough to check-in and then stepped into the quiet of the night.

The muscle memory was surprising. I believe we could have walked the path blindfolded. The trail was like an old friend celebrating our return with luminaria. It was as if we easily picked up a conversation after years of absence, as if no time had elapsed. Our feet knew where to go.

There was no hurry. We lingered. We stopped and gazed at the stars. We listened for deer. We had time to walk a second loop. We were the last to leave the trail.

We sorted through many of life’s trials and tribulations walking this path through Bristol Woods. We’ve made significant life decisions on this trail. We often began our walks with troubled hearts and left the woods with quiet minds, ready to live another day. On this night, the eve of my 65th birthday, walking our second loop, all alone, the last people on the trail, we talked of what we are learning as we age, what illusions we are no longer chasing, what simple abundance we find ourselves embracing, what freedoms we find as we put our lives into perspective. We talked of gratitude for each other and reveled in the opportunity to once again walk in quiet through our Bristol woods.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE WOODS

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To Be Home [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

Until I was 52 years old I did not know what the word “home” meant. I understood it abstractly, as an intellectual concept, as a hypothetical place of belonging…I just did not know what it felt like to be home. I was a wanderer.

I remember a moment, many years ago, when my pal Robert gave me some wise cautionary advice. I was footloose and flirting with a woman. He said, “Be careful. You don’t get involved with a woman like her unless you are ready to settle down.” I thought his caution was about the woman but later realized his wise words had nothing to do with her and everything to do with me. My friend knew me. I was restless. A wanderer.

There is more to the word “home” than a pin in a map. Google can give me directions to a location but can never show me the way home.

Home is the way Kerri and I start each day. It is different than the way others start their day, recognizable only to us and Dogga. Home is the tiny generosities that we offer each other, unique to us, unlike the considerations others offer their significant other. Home is knowing what she is feeling before she does. Home is sensing where she is in the house or in the world even when I cannot see her.

Home is knowing that she reads my mind and not minding.

I knew I was home the moment we met. I knew I was home when home had nothing at all to do with settling. I knew I was home when my wandering had a clear direction, a daily destination, a vibrant space between us that only we are capable of creating, a space that Google Maps or AI is incapable of finding or replicating or pinning down.

I now know what it feels like to be home and that feeling travels where ever we decide to wander.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE MAP

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Two Sacred Objects [David’s blog on KS Friday]

There are two sacred objects in the life of Dogga: snowman and candy cane. Both are cheap plastic squeaky toys that he carries from place to place, repositioning them throughout the day. His ultimate safe spot, the most sacred space for his most sacred objects, is in Kerri’s studio, either beneath or positioned close to her piano.

I believe her studio has become his sacred place because it is her sacred place. Her piano is her most sacred object. When she enters the room and plays he always joins her. He walks loops beneath the piano. The Dog Whisperer says that dogs are human-energy-readers and I think it is true. Kerri’s aura changes when she plays her piano. When she plays her energy brightens; it becomes pure. Dogga senses that. He sees it. Is it any wonder that he would bring his sacred objects into this sacred place?

Yesterday she sat down to play. I heard the clackety-clack of Dogga’s nails on the wooden floor as he scooped up his snowman and headed for the studio. I stopped what I was doing and literally absorbed the profound beauty of the moment. A pure moment. Two sacred objects, piano and snowman, brought together by the love shared between two sacred beings.

LEGACY on the album RELEASED FROM THE HEART © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about PIANO AND SNOWMAN

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Join The Work [David’s blog on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

We’ve had more snow in the past two months than in the past three years. I am getting reacquainted with my snow shovel who, I imagine, is delighted to finally have some actual purpose in life. My shovel is not old enough for retirement and would rather work than play golf.

I just personified my snow shovel.

I also just betrayed a bit of insight into myself. I would rather work than retire so I’ve projected that onto my shovel. That is how projection works.

It’s an easy leap for my brain to make and I know the same is true for all of you out there. Personifying a snow shovel is only slightly different than investing in a conspiracy theory or embracing a big lie despite an overabundance of facts. Personifying my snow shovel is less destructive than storming the Capitol.

Personifying my snow shovel is all for fun and is far less ruinous than gulping an obvious misdirection narrative that claims poor-Black-women-are-taking-your-tax-dollars, all the while the wealth of the nation is actually, factually, picked out of the pockets of the middle and lower classes and stuffed into fewer and fewer morbidly wealthy pockets. Robbing Medicaid to fund a massive tax break for the already-wealthy is how an oligarchy is created.

I know I am personifying my snow shovel, I know I am projecting and playing make-believe. Can the same be said for maga-nation or all the AWOL republicans out there? And, of course, their projection onto we-the-woke is that we are trying to destroy democracy. They betray a bit of themselves. That’s the way projection works.

It’s also worth noting that my newly personified snow shovel is equally adept at clearing paths through heaps of bullsh*t as it is mounds of snow. I know the same is true for most of you out there. Every time you clear a path through the lies or shovel out the inanity, you give me hope. It’s how a democracy is restored. You inspire me to grab my shovel and join the work.

read Kerri’s blogpost about SNOW

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Push A Limit [David’s blog on KS Friday]

In one of the more absurd chapters of my life I was awarded a full-ride scholarship to a graduate program in costuming. As an undergraduate student in the theatre with a focus on acting and directing I’d spent a goodly amount of time in costume shops, sewing buttons, repairing shoes, badly hemming pants. It is fair to say that anything that involves fabric makes little to no sense to me. Many dear and patient costumers kept me busy during my required costume hours with tasks that I could not bungle. They found my level of competence (very low) and helped me succeed there.

My capacity to draw opened the door of costume absurdity. While interning at The Walden Theatre in Louisville, Kentucky, the director cast me as Oberon in a production of A Mid Summer Night’s Dream. She also asked me to design the costumes. She’d seen my drawings. I was delighted and drew characters with absolutely no idea whether or not my drawings could be translated into actual garments that people could wear. The very gifted head of the costume shop recognized my vast limitations and gently helped me make fabric decisions. I learned the art of the question from her. She knew what was best – and I knew nothing at all – so her questions were precise with the correct answer baked into the framing of the question.

One day a man came to audition actors for a graduate program. The audition room was lined with my costume designs. After the auditions he found me and asked me to interview with the tech faculty of the university. It was a crazy idea, a wild hare, but I did it anyway. At the time my ship had no rudder and there was nothing on my horizon following my internship. Plus, I believed there was no way, given my very very low costume competence, that they’d offer me a spot. But they did. And I accepted.

When Kerri resurrected her box of clothes-patterns it surfaced my long forgotten time in graduate school as a costume designer. I could draw and design everything. I couldn’t construct anything. More than once I reduced my professors to tears of laughing-disbelief at my attempts to sew. More than once I stopped them in their tracks with my capacity to imagine and paint. I began that year believing I was on the wrong path – I knew I was never going to be a costume designer – and I ended the year having learned that there is no such thing as a wrong path. Those good people, the incredible artists that surrounded me each day, helped me see and embrace my gifts. They helped me laugh at my foibles. They helped me understand the great creative power – and necessity – of pushing on a limit and stepping into an unknown. They helped me find my way.

LEGACY on the album RELEASED FROM THE HEART © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE PATTERNS

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Even To The Point [David’s blog on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

I lay awake last night and listened to the chimes. They are a great source of comfort to me. There is something eternal in their sound which calms my busy mind. Guy gifted the chimes to us and I wonder if he knows what a enormous gift he gave to us: a soothing sound, a calm mind. In the warm months I sit close to them because I can feel the sound.

The earring stand belonged to Kerri’s mother. It stands on her dresser with a stuffed gingham heart at the base. Sometimes wandering through antique malls I am overwhelmed. The “things” have lost any connection to their storyteller, to the person who used them each day, and so are reduced to merely objects. Their value is no longer in their story but in their stuff-ness. The earring stand inspires a story, evokes a memory.

We’re slowly going through our stuff. There are piles in the basement. Each item in every pile has a story. The stories requires us to move slowly, deliberately. Sometimes the story requires us to hold on. Sometimes the story requires us to move it out as soon as possible. Sometimes the story has run its course and it’s time for us to move on. We need to break the connection. Sometimes we find pieces that we know would be meaningful to others, connections to lost loved ones or to long-ago cherished places. We box and ship these surprises, facilitating a re-union.

When my dad passed I wanted a few of of his shot glasses. He kept a collection, a shot-glass record of his travels and of ours since we always brought home a new addition to add to his collection. They were on shelves all over the house. They lined the mantel. My few shot glasses are prized possessions. If we had to pare down our world to the bare minimum the shot glasses would make the cut. Someday they will likely end up in an antique mall. People will see them as stuff, mere objects, and I suppose that is okay. The connection, the story, will disappear with me when I go. It will be lost to others because the connection is within me, I carry it, not the shot glasses.

That micro-revelation is the gift of cleaning out the house: I am – we are – keepers of connection. We are story collectors. Story weavers. Our possessions ring through us like the wind through the chimes, making us resonate with all that we hold dear, memories that define us even to the point of needing to let them go.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE EARRING STAND

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