An Oasis of Comfort [David’s blog on DR Thursday]

Don’t be surprised if you find us in the store, eyes closed, delighting in the scent of the Warmies – those cute cuddly stuffed animals filled with lavender. My favorite is the sloth. Kerri is fond of the bear. They provide a dose of instant calming. They are serenity found in an unlikely place, an oasis of comfort in aisle 9.

Tranquility is hard to come by these days. Each day, inundated as we are in the politics of hate, I search for tranquility in words and sometimes find it – momentarily – in a poem or the heart-touching-story of a fortuitous puppy adoption. I am buoyed by writers from Rumi to James Baldwin, keepers of our conscience, sirens to kindness.

But for lasting peace of mind it is necessary to break beyond words. Nothing beats the senses for a call into the immediate, the only place where contentment can be found: the smell of basil, the cooling evening breeze after a blistering hot day. The delightful chirp of a hummingbird as it zips overhead. The distant foghorn underscoring the cry of seagulls. The vibrant colors of the sky transitioning into night. Lavender. Rosemary. Onions and garlic sauteing. The first sip of bold red wine. The Warmies on the grocery store shelf.

I used to lead an exercise in which people would face a partner. Standing a few feet apart, the instruction was to be present-with-the-other. No words were allowed – so no fortress of distraction could be erected. Simply see and be seen. A few minutes would feel like an eternity as the impulse to hide and deflect and control slowly surrendered to the scary vulnerability of presence. The fortification, the hyper-management of image fell away. Only then could the beauty break through the mask. Unprotected, the partners would either weep or laugh or both. Seen. Seeing. In presence the tide turned. Serenity was discovered in a most unlikely place. An oasis of comfort found in the eyes of the other.

Only then could the real conversation begin.

a detail of a work in progress

read Kerri’s blogpost about LAVENDER

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Look Closely [David’s blog on Flawed Wednesday]

Look closely. The dill wilts under the heat dome. Unusually high temperatures and humidity leave it unprotected.

Look closely. Once upon a time we enjoyed an FCC policy called The Fairness Doctrine. It was also known as the “truth in media” regulation. It required broadcast media to present contrasting viewpoints on controversial issues. It was intended to promote public discourse while preventing biased media agendas. It was largely successful. Rupert Murdoch hated it. Ronald Reagan repealed it. “The demise of this FCC rule has been cited as a contributing factor in the rising level of party polarization in the United States.” The demise of The Fairness Doctrine stimulated the divisive info-bubbles that we now inhabit. It opened the door for the rise of the toxic Murdoch fox and his ultra-conservative copycats. It has left us unprotected.

Look closely. We did not arrive here by accident. Party polarization. Divisive echo chambers. Biased media agendas. The absence of civil public discourse. 24/7 commentary and opinion uprooted from reality and meant to foster outrage. It’s fertile ground for dark money purchasing politicians and supreme court justices.

Look closely: the celebration of media bias. The interruption – the dismantling – of public discourse. The unbridled magnification and normalization of lies. Polarization is great for profiteers but deadly to democracy.

Our media carries the story we tell ourselves about ourselves. Are we really hyper-biased, polarized liars so enraged that we’re incapable of public discourse? Is there truly no common ground?

Look closely. The regulation of traffic – the law – makes us capable of safe travel. The regulation does not inhibit us. It fosters necessary cooperation. Building codes are regulations ensuring that our dwellings and places of business are safely constructed. The regulations do not inhibit us – they protect us. They establish and maintain a high quality standard.

A regulation like The Fairness Doctrine was neither conservative nor progressive. It didn’t inhibit us. It ensured that we were not made victim to bad information. It established a standard for truth-in-media and engendered respect for differing perspectives.

We know how to exit our echo chambers. We know how to ensure that we are acting – and voting – on unbiased information. Healthy public discourse is the epicenter of our democracy. Healthy public discourse relies on truthful information and civil debate. We know how to foster a better field of discourse and it requires adequate regulation meant to prevent media exploitation and manipulation.

Regulation. The Constitution is a document of regulations. It is neither conservative nor progressive, it establishes simple rules for how we safeguard our values, how we live and thrive together. Breaching the boundaries, ignoring the law, like removing all traffic laws, serves to expedite our confusion and fiery demise.

Look closely. Granting presidential immunity from law is a breach. Eliminating due process and habeas corpus is a breach. Consolidating power in the executive branch is a breach. We are unprotected. ICE plucks innocent people from the streets. Congress intends to pass a bill – make a law – that impoverishes the many to enrich the few.

Integrity is the word that comes to mind. It has two relevant meanings. First, having strong moral principles. Moral principles are akin to regulations – they define shared values and provide the basis for society’s laws. They foster cooperation. The second meaning is unity. Wholeness is a result of a shared story based on common values and moral principles. The second meaning of Integrity – unity – is the blossom of the first. Division and discord are the blossoms of the collapse of shared values and breaches of communal moral principles.

It’s worth asking again: are we really hyper-biased, polarized liars so enraged that we’re incapable of public discourse? Do we really hold our democracy so lightly? Or have we been poisoned by the biased toxic fables we daily consume from the free-for-all media-stream? Are we intoxicated on the outrage daily pumped into our brains from a media the grows wealthy on our dysfunction?

Look closely. We are unprotected.

read Kerri’s blogpost about WILTED DILL

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The Composition of a Life [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

I cut the post I wrote for today. The image of this Dianthus flower is too beautiful for the thoughts I paired with it. The color of this flower kills me. The composition of this photograph would make Georgia O’Keeffe smile.

I reminded myself to not miss the beauty-of-the-moment in the middle of the national horror story we currently experience.

Chris has been on a quest for 15 years to develop a play based on Viktor Frankel’s book, Man’s Search For Meaning. A few days ago he took another step forward. He’s knocking on the door of his dream. Viktor Frankel was a Holocaust survivor and the book is based on his experiences in the camp. He makes a distinction that is relevant for us today: we have the choice to either seek meaning from our experiences or to bring meaning to our experiences. Our chances of survival are better if we bring rather than seek meaning – especially in a time, like ours, when amorality and cruelty have the reins of power. It’s hard to find meaning in the wasteland.

It’s the reason I cut my post. I was seeking meaning from the rapid collapse of our democracy rather than bringing a greater meaning to this moment-in-time.

We put the air conditioner in the window because our old Dogga suffers in the heat. Last night he was laying in his now-usual-spot directly in front of the fan blowing cold air. I sat next to him and rubbed his ears. I cannot describe the enormity of what I felt in that moment. It was more necessary, more important than anything rolling across our screens.

As I write this a bird – a house finch – is scratching at the window just behind where I am sitting. It is literally six inches from my head. I can see into its eyes. And it is looking into mine.

The color of this Dianthus kills me.

I cannot stop the national slide into autocracy. I can control where I choose to place my focus and there’s so much around me that would be a shame to miss. It’s the composition of a life that would make Georgia O’Keeffe – and Viktor Frankel – nod with silent approval.

read Kerri’s blogpost about DIANTHUS

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The Glue That Binds [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

It’s such a small line of distinction yet the implications are profound. Our mechanic, Steve, believes that he is rendering a service to members of his community. His goal – his ethic – is to do good work for the people who trust him with their cars. Consequently, he has a loyal following and a solid, healthy business. Visit Steve’s shop and you’ll find an old guy sitting in an easy chair reading the paper. No one is in a hurry. Ask a question and Steve will stop what he’s doing and come look under your car. Then, he’ll chat with you about the weather or politics or swap stories about what the kids are up to. Steve won’t try to sell you what you don’t need. Leave your car with him and more often than not, after the repair, your car magically shows up in your driveway.

I always feel good after a visit with Steve.

Across the town is a specialty shop. They do work that Steve can’t do – or won’t do – in his small garage. He used to refer clients when they needed specialty work done on their cars. Not anymore. The owner of that shop is hyper-focused on how to maximize his business so, now, if you take your car to the specialty shop, you’ll be presented with a long list of repairs that your car may or may not need. The owner of this shop is no longer driven by a service ethic; he’s driven by a profit motive. He’s definitely maximizing his business.

There is a line of distinction and it is as simple as this:

I believe what we’ve lost, what we are now missing, is what Steve embodies: a genuine service motive. It’s an old world mentality, a small town ethic: work as service to others. Social cohesion is the result of people dedicated to serving other people. You can feel it at Steve’s shop. It’s personal. People gather there. Trust is a given.

On the other side of the line is the specialty shop. It’s a mill. Business is business and business is about making money rather than caring for the needs of the customer. You can feel it. It’s become impersonal. The lobby is like an elevator: no one talks. Trust is not a given: the work is hyper-efficient, factory-esque, so customers leave doubting the quality of the workmanship because the customer is no longer the center of the equation. Cha-ching is now the boss.

Social cohesion is the casualty of business dedicated to the bottom line above the people they serve.

And isn’t social cohesion what we are lacking?

We can serve each other – the very thing that makes a community and nation great. Or, we can exploit each other – the very thing that divides a community and erodes its trust. I believe that all of those angry red-hat-wearing-fox-news-watching folks want the same thing that I want: more Steves. They – like me – don’t want to be continually exploited, demeaned, and reduced by gorilla corporate interests who use us as a resource to be consumed and not a customer to be served. We want a government that serves the people rather than lines corporate pockets. More trust.

In the afterward of her book, Michelle Obama thanks the many, many people who supported her with the double entendre, “I am glad for you.” It is the encapsulation of a service motive. The first meaning of the double: For you I am glad. Your work made me a better writer, a better person. I could not have done this without you. Your service on my behalf matters more than I can express.

Meaning number two: I celebrate you. I serve your betterment just as you serve mine. We give generously to each other because Generosity – service – is the glue that binds us: social cohesion.

It’s a simple line of distinction. It is profound.

read Kerri’s blogpost about GLAD FOR YOU

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A Mighty Bleak Picture [David’s blog on saturday morning smack-dab]

“The American people just got a taste of authoritarianism wrapped in judicial robes. In a stunning 6-3 ruling this week, the Supreme Court greenlit the mass deportation of immigrants, not to their home countries but to third nations where they have no legal status…Whether it’s a camp outside Kraków or a deportation center in Guatemala, the strategy is the same: create a zone of moral invisibility. A legal no-man’s-land where acts that would outrage decent people become routine, because they happen far away, beyond the reach of media, law, and conscience.” ~Thom Hartmann, Moral Cleansing, American Style, June 25, 2025

A zone of moral invisibility. Hear no evil, see no evil. Poof! Not only do the people disappear but so does our responsibility. So do our rights since due process was a right that applied to all people, not just citizens. Note for emphasis: I just wrote the word “was” in reference to a fundamental right that no longer “is”. The Supreme Court, supposed guardians of our Constitution – protectors of our fundamental rights – just discarded the 14th Amendment:

…nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

And along with discarding due process, habeas corpus goes with it. Wrongful imprisonment with no recourse is now – according to six members of our Supreme-Kangaroo*-Court – permitted in The United States of America.

We are officially no longer a government of laws; we are by this ruling a government of whim.

You may think this only affects immigrants. But consider: the legal precedent now exists for the government to forcibly remove someone from U.S. soil and drop them in another country without due process. Today it’s asylum seekers. Tomorrow, who knows?” ~ Thom Hartmann

What’s gonna happen? I don’t know. No one does – but if history provides a clue it paints a mighty bleak picture.

*Kangaroo Court (noun) – an unofficial court held by a group of people in order to try someone regarded, especially without good evidence, as guilty of a crime or misdemeanor.

read Kerri’s blogpost about I DON’T KNOW

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Show Up! [David’s blog on KS Friday]

They young reveler looked at me and shouted over the music, “It’s great seeing you here!” He offered a fist bump and guided me through the secret handshake that followed the bump. We laughed.

At first I was puzzled. I didn’t know him at all yet he was genuinely delighted to see me. And then it occurred to me. In his eyes I am old. My beard is gray. He was happily surprised to find an old guy dancing in the raucous sweaty crowd at Chicago PRIDE.

Kerri leaned forward and told him – well, shouted over the throbbing thunderous music – that the performer on the stage was our son. The young reveler looked like she just slapped him. “WHAT?!” he exclaimed. He turned and told his friends. They looked at us as if hell had just frozen over – a remarkable metaphor since it was 105 degrees at 7:30 pm. Parents at PRIDE! Parents celebrating and supporting their son! Impossible! Unimaginable! Fist bumps, high-fives! The young reveler shook my hand enthusiastically saying, “No Way!! No Way!!”

Their dancing resumed, more enthusiastic, more joyful, in a world made new with wondrous possibility. The word spread. Proud parents were at PRIDE, dancing! Hunky boys fanned Kerri to keep her cool. She stood on the curb so she could take pictures of the stage above the festive crowd. “You’re Craig’s Mom!” I heard declared again and again. More hugs and introductions.

Later, exhausted, on the train ride home, Kerri said, “I think it was really important that we showed up.” I knew what she meant. We unintentionally showed up for more than Craig’s performance.

I thought of something the MC said to crowd after Craig’s set, “Are you going to take care of your trans brothers and sisters? Are you going to take care of each other?” he asked. The crowd cheered and he added, “Remember, if one of us is marginalized, all of us are marginalized.” Words of caution made more relevant – and poignant – by the manufactured hatred of our times. The demonization of “the other” marginalizes all of us.

Now, more than ever, it matters that we show up for each other. I was heartened by the No Kings protests. I am heartened each time a community shines a light on masked ICE agents and shames them away from brutalizing yet another human being. Our presence – our witness – in this moment matters more than we will ever understand.

CONNECTED on the album RELEASED FROM THE HEART © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about PRIDE

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Cycles Of Change [David’s blog on DR Thursday]

“Wars and temper tantrums are the makeshifts of ignorance; regrets are illuminations come too late.” ~ Joseph Campbell, The Hero With A Thousand Faces

It is a warm evening. The breeze has shifted and comes off the lake, blessed cool. The bird alights on the pinnacle of our roof. Like us it pauses in the refreshing breeze. It drinks it in and rests. This image, this moment, is ancient and I am taken by it.

In the midst of the chaos of the country, the seeming unprecedented circumstances we now face, it is somehow comforting (to me) to remember that no one escapes the cycles of mythology. Mythology is a universal growth pattern, cutting across culture, delivered through story. It is a human-life-map. It is unwise to confuse mythology with make-believe.

Our collapse of moral authority in leadership is not unique in history. Neither is the rise of our tyrant. Neither is the corruption of our court Supremes or the silent cowardice of Congress. We follow a historical pattern just as we perform a mythological cycle.

The Roman Empire fell for much the same reasons that the American Experiment is now wobbling: political corruption, the widening gap between the haves and have-nots eroding social cohesion (maga, the impact of inanity like “trickle-down-economics”, unfair taxation, granting “personhood” to corporations…), the exploitation of division, overspending on the military, limits imposed on innovation and education (the impact of DOGE and the decimation of research among other things).

When servant leadership is upended by self-serving-leadership, the path becomes explicit. It doesn’t happen all it once. It is gradual, this erosion of the foundation takes time. This is a mythological death.

Of course, each death signals the birth of something new. As Joseph Campbell wrote of times like these, it is wrongheaded and naive to try and go back in time to capture some imaginary heyday. It is equally misguided to try to force the fulfillment of some imagined ideal. Both facilitate dismemberment.

Our protests of autocracy, our resistance to brutality, plant the seeds of our transfiguration. We will never restore our democratic republic as we’ve known it. Neither will we fulfill it as first conceived: exclusive; democracy for the few. Fire transforms and what will emerge from this hot collapse is anybody’s guess. I will probably not live long enough to see it. Gestation like this takes time, too.

However, I take heart knowing that the cycle will eventually present us with a new generation of servant leaders, people who rise from the wreckage and sacrifice personal gain for the common good. People who were transformed by this current fire. They will carry in their hearts the pain of their ancestors’ regret.

The bird on the pinnacle served as a herald of that distant day. The wind shifts, cutting through the heat, bringing with it sweet relief and the promise of the cycles of change.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE BIRD

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Know The Difference [David’s blog on Flawed Wednesday]

“Public education does not serve a public. It creates a public. And in creating the right kind of public, the schools contribute toward strengthening the spiritual basis of the American Creed. That is how Jefferson understood it, how Horace Mann understood it, how John Dewey understood it, and in fact, there is no other way to understand it. The question is not ‘Does or doesn’t public schooling create a public?’ The question is ‘What kind of public does it create?'” ~ Neil Postman, The End of Education: Redefining the Value of School.

It’s important to know the difference.

In the forests and fields through which our walking path winds, there is Cow Parsnip, Queen Anne’s Lace, and Hemlock. All sport umbrella-clusters of tiny white flowers. They are all members of the carrot family. To the untrained eye – like mine – they look similar. They are dangerously different.

Socrates was sentenced to death and was made to drink Hemlock. It’s very toxic. Queen Anne’s Lace is edible and used medicinally. Cow Parsnip can be eaten “if handled properly,” however a combination of sap and sunlight can cause a painful rash.

It is important to know the difference. It is why education is so important. It is why asking questions, stoking curiosity and looking deeper – beyond the superficial – is invaluable. The point of education, as Neil Postman reminds us, is not to get a better job, it is to be a well-rounded human being capable of making informed decisions.

“At its best, schooling can be about how to make a life, which is quite different from how to make a living.”

Republicans since Reagan have been actively undermining our public schools. Cutting budgets, hyper-emphasizing testing (answer-driven rather than question-inspiring), and waging a foxy campaign against “the woke,” a term referring to people who are curious enough to question what they are being told – a skill useful in learning. The demonizing of education and the educated has without doubt led us to this moment: a gullible, angry and easily distracted citizenry. I almost wept the day the young man, an expectant father, told me that he was going to home school his child because he didn’t want his son’s head to be filled with “any of those crazy ideas” that they teach in the public schools. He didn’t want his boy to be woke.

I wanted to tell that young man that democracy is an idea. So is fascism and communism and authoritarianism. It’s important to know the difference.

The fox and Republicans have been for years weaponizing the term “socialism”, an accusation they level when their wealth is threatened by those who question why taxation is unfair, who ask why Republicans cheer when government creates programs uplifting corporate America but snarl when government creates programs that uplift private citizens. Socialism is an idea, too. Asking questions, protecting civil rights, and believing in the promise of democracy is not socialism. It takes some study and questioning to know the difference.

There’s a reason that the cartoon symbol for insight is a light bulb illuminating brightly over a character’s noggin. Letting in the light.

Discernment. Distinction. Knowing the difference between indoctrination and education. Knowing the difference between character and corruption, value and vice, wisdom and hogwash. Knowing how to discern news from propaganda would seem to be essential – democracy-saving. Life saving.

And so, here we are, awash in a cult movement called MAGA, enabled by a feckless Republican Congress, that worships incompetence and promotes ignorance. It shields itself against even the most basic of questions and eschews responsibility for, well, anything (blame is their game). It howls in indignation at the very thought of learning. It is a celebration of the dim-bulb. Drinkers of toxic hemlock, totally incapable of discerning the difference between the deadly and the medicinal, the truth and a lie.

“Because we are imperfect souls, our knowledge is imperfect. The history of learning is an adventure in overcoming our errors. There is no sin in being wrong. The sin is in our unwillingness to examine our own beliefs, and in believing that our authorities cannot be wrong.” ~ Neil Postman, The End of Education: Redefining the Value of School.

read Kerri’s blogpost about DISCERNMENT

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Unlock The Door [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

Lodgepole pine cones require the heat of fire to open and release their seeds. Fire is necessary to unlock the door to the next generation of possibility. It is the reason our dear J, as part of her wedding gift, gave us a box filled with Lodgepole pine cones . She was encouraging us to light a fire in each other. And so we have.

As part of our solstice observance, as the sun set, we started a small fire in the fire pit, selected ten pine cones from J’s box, made wishes and set intentions for the seeds-of-opportunity that the fire would unlock, and committed our pine-cone-wishes to the flames. Moving into a new stage of life, we set targets for the next generation of our possibilities.

As I stared into the waning fire, I hoped that the hot authoritarian forest fire roaring through our nation might unlock the door to the next generation of democratic possibility. I hoped that the heat of the fire might once-and-for-all clear the tangle-weeds of white supremacy and hate, remove the undergrowth of thuggery and elitism and prepare the forest floor for new seedlings of fairness, equality and the fulfillment of democracy’s promise. I hoped that it might burn away the strangle-hold private money has on our government so we might trust that our elected officials are public servants and not greedy profiteers.

Rather than repeat the cycle, yet another go-round with oligarchy and near-authoritarianism, I wished for the nation to break the cycle of denial and dysfunction and move into a new, healthier stage of life, a democracy fully committed to democracy: a government of the people that follows a single north star: liberty and justice for all.

We hold within us the seeds.

[Since I wrote this post, we entered a war with Iran. The heat of the authoritarian forest fire just escalated and somehow…somehow…the Republican Congress remains silent. Complicit. One wonders if we must become a smoldering wreckage before they remember they are servants of a Constitution and not a political party or a pariah.]

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE PINE CONE

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Our Dull Ho-Hum [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

“In spite of indignation and anxiety over what has occurred, I cannot help wondering where we have failed. There was a time during the war when we enjoyed the trust and respect of little and big nations everywhere. What has happened to turn that, in some cases, into suspicion and disdain? We cannot blame our leaders, because we are a democracy. Somehow we the people have failed.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt, My Day, August 23, 1946

Our conversation was sparked by a post by John Pavlovitz: The people I’m struggling the most with right now are the polite people, the patient people, the people who are acting as though they are above those of us who have f*cking had it.

If our democracy fails – as it now seems is almost inevitable – we could blame the cowardly Republican congress, the unscrupulous executive or the corruption of the Supreme court. What of the responsibility that falls squarely on our shoulders?

We the people voted the corruption into place. For years we’ve tolerated the lies, the meanness of spirit, the grift. We tuned in to news that was more interested in ratings that in factual reporting. We allowed an insurrectionist, rapist, felon to run for the highest office in the land. We did not express outrage when the Supreme Court not only protected the felon, but granted him immunity from the law, elevating him to monarch status.

We’ve normalized the abhorrent. We’ve made the monstrous acceptable, ho-hum.

We have, for a decade, watched the real-time dismantling of democracy like we watch reality tv. We perform the daily doom scroll, seeking, grousing about and then forgetting the latest outrage. I return, again and again, to the forward Neil Postman wrote for his book, Amusing Ourselves to Death:

Orwell warns that we will be overcome by an externally imposed oppression. But in Huxley’s vision, no Big Brother is required to deprive people of their autonomy, maturity, and history. As he saw it, people will come to love their oppression, to adore the technologies that undo their capacities to think.

We are allowing the whitewashing of history, the celebration of ignorance over education. Only an empty-headed society would tolerate the elevation of the most unqualified to positions of leadership. 90 million people yawned and rolled over rather than go to the polls when the very existence of democracy was on the ballot. Congress knowingly confirmed a kakistocracy that made no effort to hide its authoritarian agenda.

Last weekend 4 – 6 million people took to the streets to protest the ho-hum. It was the largest protest in the history of our nation. It had no visible impact on our elected leaders. Ho-hum. They pushed forward their Grossly-Gluttonous-Bill with language that prevents the courts from checking the overreach of the executive. They added language that would make it impossible for a citizen to seek redress from government abuse.

They no longer fear the vote of the people. They are counting on our passivity. They are counting on our dull-minded ho-hum. They are counting on our capacity to change the channel when we don’t like what we are watching.

“We seem to have forgotten to weigh our values and to realize that we have to pay for the things we want. The payment which can bring about friendly and peaceful solutions is infinitely less costly than the payments which will have to be made if we are going to be an enemy to all the world.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt, My Day, August 23, 1946

read Kerri’s blogpost about HO-HUM

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