Popcorn Trail [David’s blog on KS Friday]

Late at night, standing on the platform awaiting the train to take us home, the moon and clouds gave us a spectacular show. I knew that the moon was a waxing gibbous and realized that, although I’d known and used the word since I was young, I had no idea what the word “gibbous” actually meant. It sounds like something related to gibbons, small apes that swing through trees. Is the moon gibbous because it swings through the sky? No! The moon is gibbous because it is greater than a semi-circle yet less than a circle. Gibbous describes the shape! Bulbous. Convex. Protruding.

Yesterday I unrolled many small canvases and pinned them to the wall in my studio. They are like a small flame I’ve kept for alive for over 35 years. They refer back to a large odd shaped canvas I stapled to the deck of my apartment on a sunny day, overlooking Hollywood. I had a very limited paint supply, a few cans of paint used for animation (computer animation was not yet possible so artists painted images on cells with acrylic paints), grey, blue, and white. I had a small jar of cadmium red. I taped a few housepainting brushes to long sticks and made myself a promise to “have fun and not think too much.” And I did. I had fun. I didn’t think too much. I played. In those few short hours, I painted the single piece that would influence my work for the rest of my life. I knew it was special. It was pure. It sold before I could adequately document it (remember the age before the ease of digital cameras?). It sold before I had the opportunity to install it in a gallery and show it.

I call the many small canvases my “narrative paintings”. They are a popcorn trail that I dropped as I wandered into the forest of my artistry. Some of the pieces are studied and lifeless. Some are playful and shallow. Some are raw and heart-full. I tacked them all to the wall to guide me back to the original impulse, that moment of artistic purity.

I am gibbous though, at this age, I am no longer waxing. I am greater than a semi-circle but have not yet completed my full life circle. In my time on earth I have been what Kerri calls a “strider”, someone trying-too-hard to climb the ladder of success. I have pursued my artistry like it was a wild animal, setting traps to capture what I could not easily understand. I have finally learned, or have lived long enough to realize, that I am and have always been what I chase. No traps necessary.

I follow the popcorn trail back to what I experienced that day in Los Angeles: the simple joy of being alive. A conscious moment enthusiastically expressed through a little grey, blue and white paint, punctuated with some surprise cadmium red.

IN THE NIGHT on the album THIS PART OF THE JOURNEY © 1998 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE MOON AND CLOUDS

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Expect Awe [David’s blog on KS Friday]

I can’t remember what we were searching to find. What I know is that we forgot what we were doing because we bumbled into a James Taylor concert recorded by the BBC in 1970. He was 22. An old soul. His performance in 1970 buoyed our spirits on a humid stormy morning in 2025.

While there was a break in the rain we ran outside to check the rapid growth of the sweet potato. Last week we discovered a sweet potato in the stair-well potato basket that seemingly overnight had become an alien. Hot pink tentacles reached from the basket like so many periscopes. We pondered what to do and decided to experiment and planted it. If you are a farmer or otherwise schooled in the art of growing things, please feel free to roll your eyes. Since we are not farmers and total novices at growing things, the explosion of leaves from the once-hot-pink-tentacles seems to us like a miracle. I hope this awe never dissolves into the ordinary. I like running outside with the express expectation of being amazed.

Yesterday we scrolled through some pictures taken in the fall of 2021. Following my father’s funeral we drove into the Colorado mountains to walk a piece of land by a lake, the place where he most loved to go to fish. The place where he found his peace. We lit a candle. We walked around the lake. We marveled at the color of the leaves, vibrant yellow, hot red and orange. We grieved and told stories. Looking through the photographs filled me with gratitude: at the time we knew we had to go to the mountain to celebrate his life and so we did. Four years later that inner-place of loss is full-full-full of gratitude for a simple soul who lived a simple life. The photos of that day at the lake served as a two-way-door, one way to a moment-gone-by and the other opened to this moment, teeming with appreciation.

I know without doubt that this ride is limited. Why wouldn’t I expect awe?

“It won’t be long before another day/ We gonna have a good time/ And no one’s gonna take that time away/ You can stay as long as you like./ So close your eyes. You can close your eyes, it’s alright/ I don’t know no love songs/ And I can’t sing the blues anymore/ But I can sing this song/ And you can sing this song when I’m gone.” James Taylor, Close Your Eyes

GRATEFUL on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE SWEET POTATO

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Everyday Ask [David’s blog on saturday morning smack-dab]

In an attempt to get me to relax, my dear Arnie pointed me to The Fourth Turning. “It’s a necessary cycle,” he said of our current political and national chaos, “as winter is necessary for spring.”

Astrologers point to Uranus currently entering Gemini. Astrologically, we’re in a period of great disruption. The last time Uranus knock-knocked on Gemini’s door was 1941.

In either case, the message is the same: there’s a meta-story at play and there’s no avoiding it. The tornado is here. It is going to lift and spin the house. We are destined to crash-land in Oz for a spell. There’s nothing that will change it so we might as well put on our seat belts and hold on for the ride. We will find a yellow brick road that will one day bring us back to Kansas if we are careful not to smell the poppies along the way. However, we will not be the same as when we left. Neither will Kansas. This disruption is meant to change us. Grousing about it is a necessary phase but, in the end, is not helpful.

These cyclical storms necessitate a dive into our roots. Through chaos they force us into a period of introspection.

Introspection inevitably brings us to an appreciation of the only thing we really have anyway: the moment. The smell of mint. The birds splashing in the birdbath. The voice of a friend. A second cup of coffee. The cool breeze off the lake. The color of the sky. The meaning we choose to make. Gratitude.

In my life I’ve experienced earthquakes and tornadoes, riots and two passes through Martial Law. 9/11. There is one thing that is consistently true in times of upheaval: people come together.

The horrors we enact upon each other invariably – inevitably – make us reach for one another. People lend a helping hand to their neighbors and to strangers alike. Humanity is what we find when we dive into our roots. If Arnie and the astrologers are correct, the rediscovery of our humanity, our interconnection, IS the meta-story, the reset, the symbolic return of spring.

In the meantime, amidst the brutality and disgust, it’s not a bad strategy to everyday ask, “What else is REAL?” – and revel in what you find there. Appreciating the small things are like leaving a popcorn trail that will someday lead us safely home after being so lost in the very dark woods.

read Kerri’s blogpost about WHAT ELSE IS REAL?

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Don’t We? [David’s blog on DR Thursday]

In Japan the clematis is a symbol of moral beauty. Consider it.

There are very few adequate synonyms for the word ‘beauty’ yet we know without doubt what it means. It’s a word of the senses. It is felt in the heart. It is a cup overflowing with awe and appreciation.

On the other hand, the word ‘moral’ has many, many synonyms. Virtue. Doing the right thing. Honest. Decent. Truthful. Upright. Right-minded. Just plain good. And from these adjectives – descriptions of a quality of being – we experience the undefinable: beauty.

Moral beauty. The clematis climbs. It aspires to reach new heights. Things that climb are often associated with gaining broader perspective and, therefore, wisdom attained from the experience of climbing, of overcoming obstacles, of persevering. From the heights – and the journey to get there – we see the landscape and our inner landscape more clearly. We are more capable of discerning between what is important and what is not, what has value and what does not, what is honest and what is not.

The clematis blossoms. Our blossom is called moral beauty.

It is why many of us shudder watching the ugly amorality goosestepping across this nation. It is a descent into darkness. Indecent. Dishonest. Wrong-minded. Synonyms of ‘ugly’ include perilous, dangerous, hostile, menacing, ominous. Are these not perfect descriptors of ICE?

The clematis climbs.

The nation falls.

Rather than beauty our nation reveres an alligator infested swamp. It champions a liar. Narrow minds threaten and erase greater perspectives. This nation, once a beacon of hope is now afraid of the light. Rather than overcome real obstacles, our leaders manufacture them to fuel outrage and circumvent and/or undermine the Constitution. Ignorance bellows over wisdom. History is whitewashed. The truth is hidden away in the files.

I return to the question, “What do we do?” The clematis climbs. It overcomes. It perseveres. We need not fall into the muddy pit.

It occurs to me that we have in our tradition a Golden Rule. It begins with the word “do”. It provides guidance for what we might do as a first step: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

It is a wisdom that comes from standing upon the heights after a difficult climb. That is why it is so simple. Do Empathy. Do Reciprocity. Do Consideration. Do Generosity. Do Kindness. Isn’t that what we want done unto us?

We know what to do, don’t we? We know where to start, don’t we?

Surrender Now, 24″x24″ mixed media

read Kerri’s blogpost about CLEMATIS

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The Composition of a Life [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

I cut the post I wrote for today. The image of this Dianthus flower is too beautiful for the thoughts I paired with it. The color of this flower kills me. The composition of this photograph would make Georgia O’Keeffe smile.

I reminded myself to not miss the beauty-of-the-moment in the middle of the national horror story we currently experience.

Chris has been on a quest for 15 years to develop a play based on Viktor Frankel’s book, Man’s Search For Meaning. A few days ago he took another step forward. He’s knocking on the door of his dream. Viktor Frankel was a Holocaust survivor and the book is based on his experiences in the camp. He makes a distinction that is relevant for us today: we have the choice to either seek meaning from our experiences or to bring meaning to our experiences. Our chances of survival are better if we bring rather than seek meaning – especially in a time, like ours, when amorality and cruelty have the reins of power. It’s hard to find meaning in the wasteland.

It’s the reason I cut my post. I was seeking meaning from the rapid collapse of our democracy rather than bringing a greater meaning to this moment-in-time.

We put the air conditioner in the window because our old Dogga suffers in the heat. Last night he was laying in his now-usual-spot directly in front of the fan blowing cold air. I sat next to him and rubbed his ears. I cannot describe the enormity of what I felt in that moment. It was more necessary, more important than anything rolling across our screens.

As I write this a bird – a house finch – is scratching at the window just behind where I am sitting. It is literally six inches from my head. I can see into its eyes. And it is looking into mine.

The color of this Dianthus kills me.

I cannot stop the national slide into autocracy. I can control where I choose to place my focus and there’s so much around me that would be a shame to miss. It’s the composition of a life that would make Georgia O’Keeffe – and Viktor Frankel – nod with silent approval.

read Kerri’s blogpost about DIANTHUS

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For As Long As It Takes [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

Dogga lays in the doorway and snoozes. When he hears me coming his little Aussie-dog tail wags. It is a siren call, impossible to pass without kneeling and giving him a pet. And, in those few moments my world becomes a better place.

During the time that my life was coming apart, suddenly without a place to live or the resources to rent another apartment, Carol showed up. I hadn’t seen her in a few years. She found me. She tossed a set of keys to me. “You’re staying with me,” she said. “As long as it takes.” In that moment, my world became a better place.

I have hundreds of those stories. They are ubiquitous and happen every day. I see them all around me when I pay attention.

“I love the sunshine on the quilt,” she said a moment ago. A tiny thing. The warmth of the spring sun a welcome visitor after the cold days of winter. In the sensual beauty of sun on the quilt and her deep appreciation of the moment, my world was made a better place.

Yesterday I read Marion Milner’s words in The Marginalian about the narrow focus of reason and the wide focus of sensation. The narrow focus, purpose-driven, is always seeking happiness in some other place. The wide focus, sensory, is always present in the moment – where happiness is found. She wrote, “I did not know that I could only get the most out of life by giving myself up to it.” Her words made my world a better place. An affirmation.

Touch is a word of the senses. Touch a life and, in return, life with touch you. Touch with simple appreciation and the world becomes a better place.

In the wide focus of the sensation there is no end, no goal, no achievement, no measurement. It is end-less.

In the narrow focus of mind our clocks would have us believe that we are in a race to a deadline. It is a dedication to ends.

In the vast field beyond purpose and gain there is wonder. It is time-less. Touch life with appreciation, with eyes or ears or fingers or taste – and life will fill you with appreciation.

Someone once told me that the world does not need healing. We do. And the healing we need is right at our fingertips. It is the sun on our faces, it is to feel the pull of the wagging tale, to kneel down and fall into a rich loving pet of appreciation. It is to open our very narrow focus, feel deeply, and toss keys to someone in need, saying, “For as long as it takes.”

read Kerri’s blogpost about HEALING THE WORLD

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Ten Years [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

It’s that time of year. The air temperature is still cool but the sun, when it makes an appearance, can warm your bones. More than once we’ve donned our jackets, scooched our Adirondack chairs into the sunny spots, and enjoyed the collision. “Oh my god,” I moan.

“Uh-huh,” she sighs. I appreciate that no matter how busy our day appears, we rarely fail to stop the pursuits and immerse in the moment. Against every Puritan commandment, we slow down to maximize productivity.

It’s been 10 years. 2015 was an extraordinary year. We produced and performed The Lost Boy. It was a heart project, a promise to Tom McK that took years and his passing to finally realize. After the production I thought I’d never again do anything more meaningful. Then, within a matter of weeks, we were jamming to illustrate and produce Beaky’s books. Kerri’s mom was 93, a brilliant woman born in a time when women were discouraged from any profession other than “housewife”. Nearing the end of her life she grieved the absence of “letters after my name.” Kerri knew that Beaky had years ago written and submitted for publication three manuscripts. We searched heaven and earth to find them. We produced the first book, self-published it, launched a website, organized and publicized a reading and author-signing event. And then we told Beaky. She was thrilled. Over 70 people attended her reading including the local newspapers. Beaky’s first sale, prior to the event, was in the Netherlands; she was officially an international author. She passed 18 days after her book launch. And then, in the fall of 2015, Kerri and I were married.

It’s 2025 so we are celebrating many anniversaries. In February we marked The Lost Boy. Ten year ago today (I am writing ahead) we held Beaky’s reading/signing event. In eighteen days we will mark the day she passed.

Bitter sweet. Warm cold. No matter how busy our days appear, we never fail to thread our story to the present moment. Today we will take some time and return to our Bristol Woods. We’ll reminisce about the day ten years ago that Beaky, preparing for her event, gave me a lesson in applying blush and lipstick. Kerri laughed and said, “Mom!” My heart was full and warm.

The daffodils feel the sun, too. Even though the air temperature is cool, they are making an appearance, poking their green-green shoots through the muddy soil, stretching their leaves into the promise of a new season.

It’s 2025…

read Kerri’s blogpost about DAFFODILS

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Barnacles And All [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.” ~ Thomas Merton

If you visited our house you’d immediately notice that Kerri’s design style is “well-worn and well-loved.” Rather than mask the wear-and-tear of age, she revels in it. Our dining room is a wonder, made beautiful by the marks left when she removed wallpaper. Rather than paint over the marks she recognized their unique beauty and showcased them. A happy accident. I stopped in my tracks the first time I walked into the dining room, asking, “How did you do that?”

I love our backdoor. The pressure of our hands on the door has overtime peeled and revealed the white underlayer beneath the black paint. It’s the story of our comings-and-goings. It is the mark of our human hands pressing on an old door that swells with the humidity and shrinks with the cold. It is our personal hand-print-petroglyph.

The beauty of age. The patterns of rust. The celebration of the flaw. Most people would scramble to cover the cracks or repair the damage. I have occasionally earned her Irish ire by repairing something she thought was aesthetically interesting. I have learned to ask.

Standing on our deck, Columbus was concerned that the exposed unsealed wood was disintegrating. “You oughta’ stain this,” he said. “It needs protecting.” I told him of the time Kerri pressure washed the deck, removing the patina of age. Even though with time the rough hewn look returned, she has yet to forgive herself for her pressure-washing-indiscretion.

“Kerri likes it this way,” I replied. “She doesn’t like the way it looks when it’s neat and stained.”

“Well I guess that’s the way it’s gotta be!” he smiled, knowingly.

Our house is an ever evolving work of art. A perfect home for two artists. Nothing matches yet everything goes together. It’s filled with visual and repurposed surprises. It is warm, sometimes a cocoon where we shut out the world and sometimes a place for our community to gather. It is the sanctuary where we have come to discover and appreciate ourselves, barnacles and all, while steadily growing into something we could never have imaged.

(I love this piece by Kerri)

Nurture Me on the album Released From The Heart © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about RUST

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Our Mistake [David’s blog on KS Friday]

I was grateful for the unseasonably warm day. I needed it. Earlier in the day we positioned Adirondack chairs for maximum sun and we literally soaked it up. I felt the marrow of my bones sigh with warm pleasure. We took a very slow late afternoon hike.

It was the kind of day that beckons presence. We knew it was coming so we cleared the calendar. We purposefully lost the to-do list. As evening set in we sat on the deck while Dogga pranced around the yard. The neighbors tree glowed orange. I was so captivated by the color that I didn’t see the moon above the tree until Kerri showed me her photograph. We agreed, life does not get better than this.

Earlier in the day I’d sent Yaki an email. He’d been the conductor/music director of The Portland Chamber Orchestra for years and I saw that the company announced a new music director. It concerned me since the last time we spoke he told me of his cancer diagnosis. In my email I wished him well and hoped he was in good health.

The temperatures were dropping so we came in from the deck. I was telling Kerri about my collaborations with Yaki, what a pleasure he was to work with. She asked a question about his age so I pulled up his Wikipedia page. It showed a birth date and a death date. Yaki had passed away.

It was the kind of moment that beckons presence.

Today I grieve my friend. Grief is a great giver of perspective. It is a reminder not to make assumptions. Not much bothers me today since relative to his loss everything seems minor, insignificant.

I was supposed to do a performance with him in the spring of 2023. The script was already written but a contract snag tripped up the process. We agreed to find a future date. We both believed that there would be a future date. That was our mistake.

Isn’t it always our mistake? Passing up what life offers us today, delaying it until some imagined future date?

Today I am grateful for Yaki. And, I am so glad that yesterday Kerri and I cleared the calendar, lost the all-important to-do list, and held hands while we soaked in a rare day of sun.

My performance of The Creatures of Prometheus with the PCO, Yaki Bergman conducting. 2008
You Make A Difference © 2003 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri originally wrote this piece for breast cancer research, cancer survivorship. It generalizes to any fight against darkness: “Fight for others, even if they don’t know who you are.”

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE ORANGE TREE

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After All [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

When all is said-and-done, he just wants to be by our side. Nothing makes him happier than our happiness. We are his purpose, his reason for being.

From Dogga I am learning the art of simple appreciation. I am learning that exuberance comes from the elementary. Love need not be complicated. Joy need not be complex. Each time he bounds out the door he leaps from the deck, greeting the day, as if for the first time. When I leave the house my mind is usually encumbered with a list. I assume I know what is out there. Would that I might bound out the door to greet the mystery-of-the-day with unbridled enthusiasm, each moment new.

Lately, when we attempt to go on errands, we put on his red necktie (his leash), he races toward the car, we open the car door as we always have, and he shrinks, backs up, ears down. Frightened by…something, his zeal drains. Puzzled, we lead him back to the house, take off his necktie, and leave him behind. Going on errands used to be atop his list of desires. Occasionally, we give it another try and the pattern is the same: verve until the car door opens; a retreat from the car to the safety of the house. He is an old dog now. He is also wildly empathic. I wonder if he feels the rising aggression in the world and would rather stay safely at home. I understand that. He listens to his intuition without doubt. I could learn a thing or two from his clear communication, his self-certainty.

We made 20 dinner last night for his birthday. He is Dogga’s favorite. All we need say is, “He’s comin'” and Dogga bounces with excitement and races to sit at the front door. He barks and runs circles at 20’s arrival. After dinner, with Dogga asleep at our feet, we admitted to each other that he is slowing down, showing his age. We had to stop our conversation, choking up.

When all is said-and-done, we just want him to be by our side. Nothing makes us happier than his happiness. Perhaps his lessons about love are sinking into us after all.

read Kerri’s blogpost about DOGGA SMILES

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