What Were You Thinking? [David’s blog on KS Friday]

The flakes hitting our faces felt like needles. We’d ventured out to get some photos of the lake-in-the-snow-storm. After snapping a few photos the sideways wind drove us back home. Stepping into the warmth of the house, we agreed, “That was enough!”

A few weeks ago we completely re-visioned the upstairs of our home. We repainted a bedroom. We carried sack-after-sack of discards out of the office and into the trash. We installed a repurposed bookshelf at the top of the stairs. I was amused when Kerri went to my basement archives to pull a new painting to sit atop the bookshelf. She returned with a canvas that I was preparing, an under-painting of broad grey strokes and splashes – not a finished painting. “I love it!” she exclaimed, placing the canvas atop the shelf. “Don’t you love it?”

“But, it’s not a painting yet,” I replied.

“Yes it is!” she chirped, proud of her new acquisition.

“I would have done better in my life as a painter had I not taken myself so seriously,” I said, shaking my head. “I would have saved myself some serious struggle had I learned sooner to stop at the under-painting.” She agreed to add a stroke of white to the…composition…so it would be a piece by both of us, though, to date, the…painting…remains mine-all-mine.

This morning it occurred to me that “the painting” bears an uncanny resemblance to the view of the wet snow raging just outside our sunroom window. The tones are similar. Tip the window on its side and it would be a sister piece to the canvas sitting on top of the shelf. Maybe I should title “the painting” Buh-Buh-Blizzard. Or Opus 25 In Winter Window Tones. Or, perhaps, Kerri’s Choice.

Or maybe I’ll leave it unnamed, a mystery piece for future guests to ponder. They will politely ask (as they always do), “What were you thinking when you painted the piece at the top of the stairs?”

I’ll look at Kerri and smile, saying, “Maybe you should answer this one.”

WATERSHED on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

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An Evolutionary Line [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes.” Robert Kennedy (clearly not Jr.)

This handle is well worn. It comes from a time before electricity relieved muscle and hands of much of their day-to-day duties. As artists from-another-era, we are drawn to things worn smooth by human hands. I love my brushes precisely because they are well-worn; they fit my hand because my hand, unique in all the world, has worn-its-way into the handles. My brushes carry the record of my life’s work.

Because of a play that I’m writing I’ve been reading and rereading The Oresteia, a trilogy of plays by Aeschylus. “The trilogy explores the transition from personal vengeance to a more civilized, legal system of justice.(A-I) The cycle of plays is a celebration of human evolution, progressing from the chaos of revenge and retribution to a society with a system of laws that maintain order. Aeschylus wrote the Oresteia because a society based on law was a relatively new idea, an evolutionary line drawn in the sand marking the transition from animal to human nature, from impulse-driven to rationality guided by complex moral systems. The law is the foundation stone of democracy and of our freedoms.

Currently, we are witnessing an all-out assault on the law. From a justice department driven by the retribution-fantasy of a single man to a Supreme Court undermining the Constitution it is sworn to protect, those in power would rather us devolve, step back across the line into animal revenge. They are literally taking the law into their own hands. Their revenge-imperative threatens our moral order. Our freedoms are in peril.

This is not the first time our foundation stone has been under assault, it is not the first time a privileged few deluded themselves into believing that they-and-they-alone ought to rule. The path to autocracy always begins by undermining the law, by twisting it, weaponizing it to serve the opposite of its intention.

Our system of laws is like that well-worn handle. It is our heritage, our inheritance. It fits in our hands because our hands have left our imprint upon the law and the law has left its imprint on us. We’ve worked for it, fought for it, died for it. It’s why we take to the streets. It’s why we boycott businesses that bow to authoritarianism. It’s why we run from our homes to blow whistles and record the abuses of ICE. It gives me hope.

In the final play of the cycle, the goddess Athena – yes, a goddess – establishes law and order, a legal system – better than bloody revenge – to resolve conflicts. Her new system ends a dark curse that reached back generations, a curse that had been plaguing humanity. With her system of laws and courts, her invention of a jury by peers, she opened the door for humanity to progress from primitive retribution to civil society. She laid the foundation stone for a new idea – democracy – to replace the animal-revenge-mentality perpetuated by autocrats and kings.

LEGACY on the album RELEASED FROM THE HEART © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

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Clepe Incredible [David’s blog on KS Friday]

This is the time of year that color in nature becomes shocking. It is the consequence of nature’s contrast principle: the greys and browns of oncoming winter meet the vibrant yellow, orange and red of the leaves-last-stand. Last week, while walking Dogga, I stood for several minutes beneath a tree made electric by the morning light. I felt as if I had entered another reality.

Contrast principle is really about how comparison shapes perception. I only know that I’m having a bad day because I believe that I’ve had good days. Last night I watched Anderson Cooper interview Tig Nataro for his series exploring grief. Tig Nataro recently lost her friend, poet Andrea Gibson. The love of life comes clear in the moment of the loss of life. The appreciation of life sharpens when the end rolls into view. Contrast principle.

I bumbled into an archaic word that is new to me: clepe. It means to give someone or something a specified name. To name. I was cleped David. As my end rolls into view I am more and more resisting the impulse to clepe my days. Why should my days be labeled either good or bad? On my last day, what will I be willing to give to have one more moment of this life? Why not clepe incredible each and every moment that I am fortunate enough to experience?

LAST I SAW YOU on the album THIS PART OF THE JOURNEY © 1997 Kerri Sherwood

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One Brief Moment [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“But time has many dimensions and in the end, time opens to timelessness.” ~ Peter Brook, The Quality of Mercy

One day I realized that I was like a sand painting: a bit of unique beauty created in the moment and meant to blow away with the winds. That is not a despairing thought. In fact, it was quite the opposite.

Late at night we watched a short documentary about the scale of time. It was eye-opening. The filmmaker was so overcome with realization of time that his model revealed that be broke down and cried. We are but a blip, a blink of the eye. The enormity of life. The impossibility of life.

Those who wish to have monuments erected for themselves are missing the point entirely.

Barney, the piano in our backyard, is slowly, over time, returning to dust. That is also true of Kerri’s Yamaha piano in her studio, only a fraction slower. Breck the aspen tree that came home with us from Colorado in the back seat of our car is now taller than our garage. If typical, Breck will live approximately 200 years. Twice as long as me, though the measure of time, the comparison, is arbitrary at best.

Breck and I each have our one brief moment in the sun.

GRATEFUL on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

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Golden Hour [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” ~ Plato

We’ve planted tall grasses in both our front and back yards. This is our favorite time of year to watch the magic dance of the grasses. They put on their suits of warm autumn colors, yellow, orange and purple, and during golden hour, they literally glow while swaying in the breeze. It is sometimes shocking how beautiful they become in the golden hour.

I just learned that there are two meanings to the phrase “the golden hour.” The first refers to the quality of diffused warm light in the period shortly before sunset or just after sunrise. The second is new to me: “The term also has a separate, critical meaning in emergency medicine, referring to the first 60 minutes after a traumatic injury during which time is of the essence for surgical intervention.” (Wikipedia) The chances of survival are greater if treatment begins within the golden hour.

It was the phrase “willful ignorance” that stopped my scroll, landed me on Plato’s quote. It made me laugh. It is a phrase that, for me, now encapsulates the republican party, maga, and anyone who daily consumes fox news. It is one thing to be ignorant. It is another to choose ignorance. We are witness to the path of destruction wrought on our nation by people who are willfully ignorant, people who fear the light.

The results of the recent election read like both definitions of the golden hour. The injury to our nation has been substantial but our chances of survival just increased with a just-in-time intervention. And, what felt like a rapid descent into darkness just entered a golden hour. Time will tell if this period of warm, diffused light is a sunset or a new beginning: sunrise. My hope is for the latter, a new day guided by people who are not afraid and who welcome the light.

HOLDING ON/LETTING GO on the album RIGHT NOW © 2010 Kerri Sherwood

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The Feeling Of Normalcy [David’s blog on KS Friday]

“If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.” ~ Lao Tzu

After a long week of travel and a few days delay due to nasty weather, we took advantage of the first bit of sun and returned to our trail. It was as if an entire season had passed in our brief absence. So much life happened in such a small amount of time.

In truth, on the road home we discussed how it felt as if we’d been away for years. We felt as if we’d stepped into an alternative universe. Like a science fiction movie, it seemed that our rocket ship returned to earth and although we’d only aged a few days, the earth had aged a few hundred years. The world we knew no longer existed. It was a strange feeling to walk a trail we knew so well and yet it felt unknown.

It was, perhaps, more unsettling because that is how I feel about these un-United States these days. I walk through my days in places that I recognize and yet it is made strange by a congress that is effectively dissolved, the rapid destruction of the symbol we call The White House, a president blatantly and gleefully bilking the nation while building a Marie Antoinette ballroom while democracy crumbles, people starving, people being plucked off the street and disappeared for no other reason than their skin is brown, and the highest court in the land, rather than protecting the Constitution, betraying it, shoveling more power to the autocrat. We are no longer headed for a fascist state, we have arrived.

And I go to the grocery store as I always have. I rake the leaves that fell while we were gone. We make dinner each night. When the sun peeks from behind the clouds, we return to our trail and walk so we might feel a bit of normalcy.

But the feeling of normalcy is now our enemy. Human beings are excellent at adapting and even more skilled at denying; making the atrocious acceptable. Normalizing the outrageous is now the force we must resist. We have already gone too far in normalizing the monstrous, in accepting the incessant lies and petulant abuse of power – and willing abdication of responsibility in The House, the cowing of the once-free-press. We cannot allow the loathsome to become our new normal. We cannot become accustomed to oppression.

We can, however, recover the impulse that gave our nation its birth: we know how to rebel against a bully king doing the bidding of the morbidly wealthy. We know how to join with our neighbors and speak truth to power-run-amok. We know how to say to corrupt tyrants, “This will not stand.” We know how to set course toward a more perfect union, a nation where all people are created equal, respected, and protected equally under the law.

[Happy Halloween! I just had a conversation about costumes and what I would wear to be the most scary. My answer: a republican. What kind of monster takes away food assistance from the most needy to give more money to the already morbidly wealthy? And then lies about it. Scary.]

MILNECK FALL on the album BLUEPRINT FOR MY SOUL © 1997 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

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See The Sacred [David’s blog on KS Friday]

I’ve decided that one of the many problems we face as a culture and as a nation is that we do not recognize our sacred moments. We generally miss the extraordinary because they often come dressed in ordinary clothes; we look for grand gestures, tablets from the mountaintop, or confuse the sacred with something more entertaining. We miss the moment when we participate in the sacred, moments like voting, moments like speaking freely. There are moments like helping a neighbor, working at a food bank, volunteering at a school. Making someone’s life better is sacred.

Sacred moments are often gritty or mundane. They are not always like watching the sunrise over the lake on an anniversary.

Sometimes sacred moments are spontaneous. In the wake of the storm we wandered down to the park adjacent to the harbor. She wanted me to see the gazebo where the bands play. It’s an intentional place, a beautiful structure meant to be a center where the community gathers. Climbing the steps to the rain-soaked deck, I saw the idea pop into her mind. She pulled out her phone, brought up a piece of music that is sacred to us, If Ever You Were Mine by Cherish The Ladies. We waltzed as we did ten years ago. Our dear Linda taught us to waltz to this piece of music, our first dance at our wedding reception. Sacred.

We danced. Kerri led – just as at our wedding – and we laughed and laughed. I do not hear the beat as well as my musician wife. For us – for me – dancing badly with her is sacred.

The people in the park taking a rainy night constitutional gave us a wide berth. They must have thought the couple waltzing in the gazebo must be crazy or a menace to the public. We waltzed and because once was not enough, we waltzed again.

That’s the misunderstood characteristic of the sacred: it need not be reserved for rare occasions; the sacred can be courted, woven into the the everyday, the ordinary: the sound of the chimes that Guy gifted to us, the song of the cardinal or the hummingbird at the feeder. Raking the leaves on a crisp autumn day. The smell of freshly ground coffee. Holding hands as we descend the steps of the gazebo, splashing in puddles, shaking the rain from our hair.

Sacred.

SLOW DANCE on the album AS SURE AS THE SUN © 2002 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes or streaming on Pandora

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The Way It Works [David’s blog on KS Friday]

She looks for hearts so, of course, she sees them everywhere. That is the way perception works. We have it backwards: we do not “believe it when we see it,” rather, “we see it because we believe it.” We see what we expect to find.

In these un-United States we are witness to the power of propaganda to shape belief. The Fox has millions believing that they are victims of a scary monster named Woke. They are steeped in the illusion of an imagined immigrant invasion. They are choking on the belief that our society is rotting from progress, under assault by the learned. None of these threats exist but that has no bearing on what the fox-mesmerized-audience perceives-and-believes. They look for boogeymen everywhere and, therefore, that is what they see. They see it because they believe it. No facts necessary. Reason cannot punch through the blindness of their hard faith. Heart is nowhere visible in their dark, mean-spirited perception.

Last night we made a pact with our pals. We vowed to slap each other awake if we grow rigid as we age. “I want to stay curious. I want to keep learning. There’s so much to learn.” Yes. And, again, yes.

I left our evening together so grateful for the people populating my life who are, like me – like us – dedicated to seeing miracles in the everyday. They look for possibility and, so, they find it. They are not afraid to challenge what they believe. They question. They step into the unknown. Their belief has not calcified, rather, it remains fluid and expansive. They grow. They check the veracity of what they are told. They do not seek to blame others for their obstacles. They seek the best in others and – you’ll not be surprised – they find it. That is the way perception works. That is the way a healthy society works.

LEGACY from the album RELEASED FROM THE HEART © 1995 Kerri Sherwood

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Two Are One [David’s blog on KS Friday]

You might not believe it but it’s true. On the day we met – moments after we met – we spontaneously held hands and skipped – yes, skipped – out of O’Hare International airport, all the way to littlebabyscion in the parking garage. Our souls knew what our brains could not understand.

Little Miles calls us KERRIANDDAVID as if our names were one word. Through his child eyes he sees what our souls knew the day we skipped out of the airport. Two names, one word.

Ten years ago today we once again spontaneously held hands – and skipped out of the church. Our bodies finally caught up to what our souls already knew. Two are one. Naturally.

Holding hands, skipping. In all ways for always.

Our song. Kerri composed and recorded this for our wedding. AND NOW © 2015 Kerri Sherwood

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It Is The Time [David’s blog on KS Friday]

Yesterday I painted the rail on the front porch. I sanded the small windows upstairs; they need repainting. One of the window sills in our bedroom has water damage. It is next on my list to fix before the snow returns.

I realized what I was doing; what we are doing. Since we cannot control or impact in any way the rapid destruction of our democracy – at the hands of those sworn to preserve it, no less – then I will do my best to attend to what I can control. I will be a good steward of our home. I will fix what I can.

She said, “We have to do something to pull our heads out of this madness. At least for a little while.” Yes. We bumped into them on our walk around the neighborhood, a couple who we admire. We shared our concerns and dismay. We have to do something to remind us of goodness, that people of good intention are all around, even when it feels hopeless. Our brief sidewalk chat gave us hope. We are not alone in our worry. We are not alone in our belief in goodness.

We harvested the last of the peppers. This summer our garden was prolific. The basil exploded. The tomato plant is still producing. The garden, the yard, the pond, the appearance of the frog…the exercise of intentionally coming into the moment, the place were common sense can be found when it is otherwise absent.

I had a revelation, the release of a judgment. David Neiwert told a story of the German people, living in villages just outside of the concentration camps, each morning sweeping the ash from their sidewalks and window sills. After the liberation the villagers claimed that they had no idea what was happening in the camps. How could they not know? Sweeping their steps, picking their peppers, painting the rail on their front porch…doing anything possible to pull their heads out of the madness.

This is not the time to look the other way. This is not the time to normalize the obscenity that is erasing our nation. People are already disappearing into camps. Due process and habeas corpus are gone. The Supremes ruled that racial profiling is lawful: it’s no different than sewing yellow stars on clothes. Now, we hear from the dictator wannabe that “the enemy is within”: the enemy is anyone who disagrees with the fascist fire raging across the nation. Anyone who protests or questions. My revelation? I do not want to someday sweep ash from my walk while telling myself that I have no idea what’s happening.

We know. So do the republicans.

This is not the time to normalize the obscenity. This is not the time to look the other way. It is the time for all people of goodness to join hands in the commons, to stand together, to call out the lies, to push our elected leaders to push back against this corruption, this out-of-control authoritarian regime.

It is the time, our time, to be good stewards of our nation-home.

BRIDGE on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

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