After All [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

We spent some time hanging out with Frank over the holiday. He is 93 and doing a stint in rehab. Frank is filled to the brim with great stories told with the laughing good humor of a man who has made a friend of folly. On our way out the door he said, “After all, isn’t that what’s most important in life, what life is about? Good friends. The relationships we enjoy. The time we spend together” We nodded and he added, “It seems like we have nothing to complain about.”

Frank is among my role-models for how to age well. Stay wide-open to new experiences. Believe in the goodness of people. Dance the twist at every opportunity. Laugh at yourself. Cultivate your mischief. Stand firmly planted in gratitude.

A few years ago I read about a comic whose performances and life blossomed when he realized that his job was not to make people laugh, rather, it was to bring them to their laughter. It’s subtle but profound: focus on what you bring to others, not on what you get from them. Later, as we prepared our Guinness Irish stew and mashed potatoes, I realized this simple message was Frank’s superpower, the reason why I admire him: even at 93 years old in rehab, even while facing an impossible mountain to climb, his focus was on what he could bring to us. There was not a hint of self-pity. There was no mention of his aches, pains or growing list of obstacles. He told fishing stories and regaled us with adventures from his youth. We laughed and bantered and left feeling full to the brim with great stories and good humor.

“After all, isn’t that what’s most important in life, what life is about? Good friends. The relationships we enjoy. The time we spend together” We nodded and Frank added, “It seems like we have nothing to complain about.”

read Kerri’s blogpost about GATHERING

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Feed The Marvels [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

Last year Carl Blanchet walked all 2650 miles of the Pacific Crest Trail in less than 90 days, a feat that would have killed most of us. This year he’s walking the PCT again, not to break his previous personal record, but to do the opposite. This time Carl is taking his time. He’s moving slowly. He’s watching sunsets. He’s smelling flowers. He’s making new friends along the way.

Carl’s gratitude is magnetic. His enthusiasm for small things is contagious. He finds magic in a tiny swimming hole. He exudes appreciation and simple kindness. He giggles at the colors of the sunset. He can’t wait to walk another mile and share it with his audience.

He has become one of our favorite bright lights in this dark time. Each night we look forward to his next installment, to spending a few moments with someone who intentionally immerses himself in the love of life.

He is a stark counterpoint to those immersing themselves in hate. He reminds me of what is possible. He reminds me of the power of the cliché: where you place your focus grows. Carl’s enthusiasm for life comes from a decision; it is an intention.

He reminds me to look for the light, to feed the positive, to not let a single sunset go by unnoticed and without celebration. It’s not so difficult to beat back the darkness when our dedication is to see – to focus on – and feed in each other – the abundant marvels readily available in this life.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE SKY

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Above All Else [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

“Life is strange. You arrive with nothing, spend your whole life chasing everything, and still leave with nothing. Make sure your soul gains more than your hands.” ~ unknown

As a young artist Roger often asked, “What is sufficient?” If you solely choose an artist’s path – or an artist’s path chooses you – the odds of realizing a modicum of financial prosperity are slim. An artist in the USA necessarily makes peace with chasing a different kind of wealth. Soul wealth. Yet, the question of sufficiency is important to ask since it is the thin ice that many artists – especially as they age – disappear beneath. It is impossible to live on the bottom of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs indefinitely. Perpetually struggling for food, heat, and shelter will inevitably drown the muse.

What is sufficient to keep the muse happy and fed?

Kerri came home and told me of a conversation she had with Steve. Most people – including us – want nothing more than to live a simple life. We do not need to own yachts or mansions. With the disappearance of the middle-class, the stagnation of wages, the wealth of the nation running to the top 1%…more and more people in these un-United States are sliding to the bottom of the Hierarchy of Needs. It’s one reason why there is so much anger out there. Safety is further and further out of reach for more and more people. Sufficiency is nowhere to be found.

We watched a conversation between two people who make their living on social media. Their discussion revolved around the cancer that social media has become. They explained that the algorithms sort to the extremes. The middle ground is nowhere to be found in social media conversations. Extremist views are elevated while moderate voices are minimized. In their conversation, they asked their substantial viewership to turn off their screens and go outside and sit with real people. Real connection is only possible when sitting face to face with real people – and that’s the only place where we might reclaim our common ground, our communal sufficiency, our safety – especially with those whose opinions differ from our own. Middle ground is a shared space.

Craig enticed me into a long text conversation about artistry. It made me reflect on what I believe and how many great mentors and teachers I have enjoyed. In my life I have been rich in life-guides. I still am. I told him that all of the great artists I have known – or who have been inspirations for me – have wrestled with their demons and, therefore, were fearless at asking hard questions of themselves and of others. Their hard questions, in the form of lyrics or images or dances or compositions or characters that they played…ultimately transformed their demons into teachers. They walked toward their fears and made them into something beautiful.

I lost three of my guide stars in the past few years. They created lives of sufficiency. They thrived beyond any measure that money could bring. Simple lives marked by a real connection with real people. Lives lived in conscious – and joyful – support of other people. Three rich souls who gained in their lives more than a mansion or piles of money that they would have never been able to spend. They brought people together.

The single thing that I remember about these three artists – above all else – above all that they taught me – is their abundant laughter. Isn’t that the sign of a good life well-lived? A life to emulate?

read Kerri’s blogpost about SOUL GAIN

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The Only Question [David’s blog on KS Friday]

Breck the aspen tree is no longer a sapling. Since May she has grown a few feet taller. Her trunk is now the sturdy stock of a mature tree. Her bark is taking on the whitish hue of mature aspens. We stand at her base, crane our necks looking up, and marvel. In a few short months we have watched her come-of-age.

In a contentious time, an age of the disappearance of justice and the rise of a criminal, Breck is a reminder for us of all that is good. When we need a dose of sanity, when we need a reminder that nature takes little notice of human folly, we sit with Breck. We allow ourselves to be soothed by the comforting shimmer of her quaking leaves.

Joseph Campbell wrote The Hero With A Thousand Faces in 1949. I almost spit my coffee this morning when I read, “The tyrant is proud and therein resides his doom. He is proud because he thinks of his strength as his own; thus, he is in the clown role, as a mistaker of shadow for substance; it is his destiny to be tricked.”

I know it is a mistake to conflate myth with biography, yet, have you ever read a more perfect description of our authoritarian wanna-be?

Myth meets the historical moment. The tyrant is a clown. He is a mistaker of shadow for substance. He thinks his strength is his own. His destiny is to be tricked. Campbell also wrote that, in the mythic cycle, the tyrant, “usurps to themselves the goods of their neighbors, arise, and are the cause of widespread misery. They have to be suppressed.”

Usurping to himself the goods of his neighbors? Check.

The cause of widespread misery? Check.

In mythology, the tyrant is the harbinger of the hero’s rise (note: the hero need not be a male). “The great figure of the moment (the tyrant) exists only to be broken…The ogre-tyrant is champion of the prodigious fact; the hero the champion of creative life.”

The word “prodigious” in this sentence = unnatural, grotesque.

Locked in a shadowy lie-about-the-past with a monstrous clown? Or, progressing forward toward actual possibilities? We are a nation quaking to come-of age.

The tyrant exists only to be broken – and it makes sense in mythology and in the patterns of history. Breck can only grow in one direction. The same is true of us. The only question is how much damage will the tyrant do before we-the-people, the actual hero in our tale, awaken, open our eyes and rise?

WATERSHED on the album AS IT IS © 2004 Kerri Sherwood

watershed,(noun): an event or period marking a turning point in a course of action or state of affairs.

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about BRECK

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Hummingbird Hope [David’s blog on DR Thursday]

Hummingbirds bring to mind my great aunt Dorothy. Outside the door of her tiny mountain home, precariously perched – and tilting slightly – on the hill above the Central City Opera House, she maintained a festival of brightly colored hummingbird feeders. She was a no-nonsense woman who cooked her meals on a cast iron wood burning stove. She loved her hummingbirds.

I felt Dorothy hanging out with me when I planted the cardinal flower in the huge rusty-ancient-fire-pit that we placed near the hummingbird feeder to help attract more hummingbirds. Kerri loves her hummingbirds.

For weeks the cardinal flower was flowerless. It did a fine Jack-and-the-Beanstalk imitation, growing tall, reaching for the sky. “Where are the blossoms?” she asked. I shrugged. This was my first cardinal flower so I was clueless. I was, however, mightily impressed that it had grown taller than me.

Hummingbirds, like us, are not fans of very hot and incessantly humid weather so they abandoned our region and sought fairer climes. Their absence has been palpable. There were so many zipping about earlier in the summer that their disappearance is magnified.

Unusually, because of the heat-smoke-and-humidity-combo-platter, we’ve mostly been inside, staying close to “the cold box”. We’ve abandoned our usual outdoor living and make only quick forays into the yard to water plants, pull weeds, and harvest basil or jalapeño peppers. As the weeks passed we’d mostly forgotten about the flowerless cardinal plant. We stopped refreshing the hummingbird feeder.

The first pop of color nearly knocked us over. The red was electric against the viridian ivy slowly covering our neighbor’s garage. Within a few days, despite the persistent heat and humidity, a single hardy hummingbird visited and drank deeply from the blossoms. Kerri quickly whipped up a new batch of sugar water and refilled the feeder.

We’ve not yet seen another. I imagine the lone hummingbird was a scout for the hummingbird clan and reported that although it found a brilliant cardinal plant and a fresh batch of sugar water, the conditions remained unfavorable. The smokey heavy air was not ideal for flight.

And so we wait.

Dorothy used to stand at her kitchen door, watching the hummingbird feeders in her tiny mountain yard. “They give me hope,” she’d say.

We watch our feeder and towering cardinal plant from the kitchen window. “Do you think they’ll come back?” she asks.

“Of course,” I say. “We can only hope.”

read Kerri’s blog about THE CARDINAL PLANT

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The Door [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” ~ Joseph Campbell

We leaned an old door against the garage. The towel rack serves as an excellent perch for birds. Initially, we entertained the idea of hanging a basket of flowers from the rack but abandoned the idea. As time and weather peel back the layers and reveal the door’s history, we are delighted that we left well-enough alone. The door is beautiful and needs no adornment.

I am rereading The Hero With A Thousand Faces, Joseph Campbell’s masterwork introducing us to the idea of a monomyth: the story-pattern found universally in folklore, myths, religious narratives…across cultures. The human journey. This time through I am slow-reading the book, taking in only a few pages a day – or sometimes if it strikes me I linger on a single paragraph. In this phase of my life I am less interested in consuming information and more wanting to savor what I read. I am not trying to “get there” or to “achieve” or ascend the heights of knowledge mountains. I am in favor of strolling and appreciating.

Sitting on the step of the deck, watching Dogga explore the crab grass, I realized that we placed the door directly opposite of Barney the piano. And, because my mind is savoring mythic journeys I was amused at the creation of our unintentional sculpture. Music is Kerri’s bliss. Since she fell and broke both of her wrists the door has been mostly closed. Recently she cleaned out her studio. It feels good in there! There’s light and space and new energy. Occasionally, spontaneously, she will run in and play for a few minutes. Dogga and I exchange a knowing look: the muse is calling.

There was certainly a departure from the known. There have been challenges – more than I care to count. Like Barney and the door, the old world collapses, layers peel away, revealing history long unattended. In the collapse the purest form emerges and finds new light. Though the journey is not yet complete, I am witness to her transformation.

We placed an old door opposite of Barney. Where once there was only a wall, I have faith that this door will open. She will return to the land of the known, and as the monomyth foretells, she will bring with her a boon, a special gift gained from her arduous journey.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE DOOR


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On This Day, Ask [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

Conscience (noun): an inner feeling or voice viewed as acting as a guide to the rightness or wrongness of one’s behavior.

This day that we call Memorial Day began as a way to honor and remember the Union soldiers that died in the Civil War. Theirs was a just cause: the end of slavery. The preservation of a nation. Originally, this day was known as Decoration Day. Now it is an observance of all military personnel who died serving – and preserving – the conscience of the nation.

It is important to remember on this day – especially on this day – that the men and women we commemorate, each and every one – swore an oath to “support and defend the Constitution of The United States” against all enemies foreign and domestic. They gave their lives honoring their oath and defending the Constitution.

Today, current members of the military face an untenable conflict. In their oath they have also sworn to obey the orders of the President of the United States. Currently, their oath is to a man who has no interest in supporting or defending the Constitution. He is actively destroying it.

Today, we face an untenable situation. We cannot in good faith both decorate service member’s graves and subscribe to the actions of the current administration. We cannot in good faith whisper words of hallowed remembrance and keep silent while these fallen men and women are being betrayed by a Republican Congress that actively dismantles the Constitution – at the behest of a Republican President that is, himself, a draft dodger, a man who regularly debases service members and ridicules their sacrifice. We make hypocrites of ourselves if we do not defend the sacrifice made by these men and women interred in our cemeteries.

When will our consciences grow?

Our Civil War was fought ostensibly to put an end to horrific human suffering. It was a war fought for the conscience of our nation. That is why we began the tradition of decorating the graves of Civil War veterans – so that we wouldn’t forget them or the cause that they gave their lives to defend.

They knew what was right. We know what is right. We also know what is wrong. So does the Republican Congress, even as they betray their oath.

Standing graveside we must ask why so many who have sworn a similar oath to The Constitution follow the lead of a man who has no conscience, a man who lacks the still small voice. A child-man who cannot see beyond an-eye-for-an-eye. A man who threatens to turn the rifles of the servicemen and servicewomen that he commands upon the citizens of the nation in order to achieve his objective of demolishing democracy as outlined in The Constitution.

What will our service members do in that moment? Will they serve or betray their oath to the Constitution? Will they serve a President who asks them to betray all they stand for, who commands them to ignore their still small voice while he moves to silence the voice of the people and the conscience of the nation?

What will it take for our consciences to grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

It’s important for us to ask on this day – especially this day – what will it take for us to act, to defend our Constitution, to honor in more than whispered words the sacrifice of those who died defending the conscience of our nation?

read Kerri’s blogpost on this MEMORIAL DAY

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An Audacious Thing [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

I love it when the parks department rakes the beach. It reminds me of a Zen garden. Yohaku-no-bi: “The beauty of blank space.” I read that Zen gardens are meant for contemplation rather than meditation. Intentional thought rather than quieting the mind. What could be a better topic of contemplation than the beauty of blank space?

I have given much of my life to sitting before a blank canvas contemplating possibilities. Raking the sand in my garden.

Today Dwight flies to Portugal where he will embark on a pilgrimage. I love what he wrote as he prepared for his adventure: “…what audacious thing might occur to me when I let my mind get quiet?” Embracing the opportunity and the unknown!”

I flipped his words for contemplation: When I let my mind get quiet what audacious thing might occur to me?” Following a sentiment attributed to Aristotle, if “nature abhors a vacuum”, then a quiet mind is an invitation to the audacious.

A blank canvas. A quiet mind. An audacious thing. An embrace of the unknown opportunity. Beauty.

I didn’t intend it but I just wrote a haiku, a send off for Dwight using his own words:

An audacious thing:

An embrace of the unknown.

Opportunity.

Walk in quiet beauty, my friend.

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE BEACH

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Our Mistake [David’s blog on KS Friday]

I was grateful for the unseasonably warm day. I needed it. Earlier in the day we positioned Adirondack chairs for maximum sun and we literally soaked it up. I felt the marrow of my bones sigh with warm pleasure. We took a very slow late afternoon hike.

It was the kind of day that beckons presence. We knew it was coming so we cleared the calendar. We purposefully lost the to-do list. As evening set in we sat on the deck while Dogga pranced around the yard. The neighbors tree glowed orange. I was so captivated by the color that I didn’t see the moon above the tree until Kerri showed me her photograph. We agreed, life does not get better than this.

Earlier in the day I’d sent Yaki an email. He’d been the conductor/music director of The Portland Chamber Orchestra for years and I saw that the company announced a new music director. It concerned me since the last time we spoke he told me of his cancer diagnosis. In my email I wished him well and hoped he was in good health.

The temperatures were dropping so we came in from the deck. I was telling Kerri about my collaborations with Yaki, what a pleasure he was to work with. She asked a question about his age so I pulled up his Wikipedia page. It showed a birth date and a death date. Yaki had passed away.

It was the kind of moment that beckons presence.

Today I grieve my friend. Grief is a great giver of perspective. It is a reminder not to make assumptions. Not much bothers me today since relative to his loss everything seems minor, insignificant.

I was supposed to do a performance with him in the spring of 2023. The script was already written but a contract snag tripped up the process. We agreed to find a future date. We both believed that there would be a future date. That was our mistake.

Isn’t it always our mistake? Passing up what life offers us today, delaying it until some imagined future date?

Today I am grateful for Yaki. And, I am so glad that yesterday Kerri and I cleared the calendar, lost the all-important to-do list, and held hands while we soaked in a rare day of sun.

My performance of The Creatures of Prometheus with the PCO, Yaki Bergman conducting. 2008
You Make A Difference © 2003 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri originally wrote this piece for breast cancer research, cancer survivorship. It generalizes to any fight against darkness: “Fight for others, even if they don’t know who you are.”

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE ORANGE TREE

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Step Into The Path [David’s blog on DR Thursday]

“When living simply, most people’s problems were part of the breathing and functioning of The Big Picture of life, for which few humans, if any, had a large enough vision or imagination to comprehend.” ~ Martin Prechtel, Long Life Honey in the Heart

Our snake plant has easily tripled in size since we brought it home. It resides on the deep window sill in our living room and will soon outgrow its nook. We tease about cutting holes in the ceiling to accommodate its astounding reach. It is a constant source of inspiration; sometimes it seems like an alien being, sometimes kelp-like and belongs in the ocean, often the light-play on its leaves makes Kerri run for her camera.

“To the Tzutujil, people were not put into this world to have a good time; they were put here to be beautiful.” ~ Martin Prechtel

Following the recommendation of Horatio, I have been painting crap for weeks. To be clear, I haven’t been painting crap – that would be odd – rather, my work has been crap. Making messes. Rather than brushes I’ve been using rags and scraping tools. Wiping off, covering over, finger painting. It’s freeing.

My studio is a sanctuary where I can, for a little while, forget what is happening in-and-to our nation. Each day I read or receive an email with these questions: What is happening? What is going to happen? The first is easy to answer: our democracy is being systematically dismembered. The second is impossible to know.

I remembered a play titled The White Rose. It chronicles the arrest and ultimate execution of students from the University of Munich who protested against and resisted the Nazis. It prompted me to Google what the German people did to resist the rise of Hitler. It might surprise you to learn that the German people did not go quietly into the fascist dark night.

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” ~ Anne Frank

Do you remember the pro-Democracy protests in Tiananmen Square and the man who stood in front of a tank? Not all people have had freedom of speech, a free press, a society striving for social equality, the privilege of voting…they would die – and have died – for what we have taken so for granted that it is now, by popular vote, being stripped away.

The potential loss is too great to comprehend.

Did you learn about The Selma Marches* in school? Black Americans were being prevented from voting. Thousands of non-violent protesters marched and were met by violence. It was a seminal moment in the Civil Rights Movement in the United States. We have in our history great examples of courage in the face of thuggery. John Lewis. Martin Luther King. Rosa Parks and Liz Cheney are cut from the same cloth.

Empowered people empower others. What is going to happen? What we allow to a happen.

Anne Frank wrote from her hiding place, “In the long run, the sharpest weapon of all is a kind and gentle spirit.” Kind and gentle spirits need not be passive or alone. They can join hands and march. Together they can face-down the corruption and indecency. They can harbor the persecuted. They can step into the path of an oncoming tank and with their courage touch the heart and shared humanity of the world.

*No matter what history the current administration attempts to erase, it is Black History Month and the history of the United States is rich with people of courage who faced incredible resistance to preserve and forward the ideals of democracy.

detail of a painting in progress: can you see her face?

read Kerri’s blogpost about SNAKE PLANT

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