Try This [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

A lonely cloudy day. I wandered through a farmer’s market. The sun-baked-old-man behind the table looked up, waved me over, cut a slice of peach and said, “You have to try this.” I accepted his offer. I couldn’t believe how delicious it tasted. Seeing the taste-revelation in my eyes, he told me a thing or two about peaches. I bought a few and continued on my way, no longer feeling alone.

The other day, after yet-another-day of fruitless job searching (good pun, yes?), Kerri cut a peach and we stood at the counter, savoring. I was tossed back in time to that lonely day, the sun-baked-farmer, the taste revelation. I can’t recall a thing he told me about peaches but I vividly remember the taste. I remember the kindness in our conversation. He wasn’t in a hurry. He had all the time in the world to share with me what he knew.

Sometimes, as I recount these experiences, I wonder if they happened the way I remember them or am I determined to give them a positive spin? Was that old farmer as kind as I paint him? Did he see a lonely man passing his booth and cut a peach to lift his spirits? Or, was he a really good salesman? Or both/and? I want to believe in his generous spirit. I felt it. So I will hold on to my interpretation. He knew about peaches. He knew about loneliness. He knew one thing might help the other.

A second hand lesson from way back: Find the artists. Ask them to tell you about what they know. People like to share their stories, their knowledge, their foibles, their wisdom. And, most importantly, assume everyone is an artist.

Sometimes it’s a simple as cutting a peach…

read Kerri’s blogpost about PEACHES

like. share. support. comment. thank you.

See The Angels [on KS Friday]

Like most people I have had some dark nights of the soul. Fortunately, I also have a life rich in beacons, special people that shine bright and light the way in my darkest hours. Best-of-all, my beacons are visible on sunny days, too. Some of my beacons have been around for the long haul. Some show up in a moment and disappear as fast as they appeared.

It’s hard not to believe in guidance when surrounded by so many living lighthouses.

Once, on a snowy day in a local store called PeaceTree, the man behind the counter told Kerri that she was surrounded by good angels. It was a comfort and gave her courage to head out into the storm.

Yesterday, Jonathan’s passing had us talking about good angels. He was certainly an angel for us. It made me realize (again-and-again) that the good angels that surround us are not ethereal unseen spirits. They are visible. Humans. Folk. Peeps. 20. Brad and Jen. The Up-North-Gang. Horatio. They are the friends that show up to help, Arnie and Dwight. The people that call out-of-the-blue to check-in. They are the world’s best mechanic that fixes our car and then delivers it to our driveway. The notes from Judy or Jim. The texts of encouragement from Rob or Mike or David. The “likes” from Alex and Buffalo Bob that revitalize us everyday to keep writing, keep creating. Brenda and Cris reaching out to us when they hear one of Kerri”s compositions streaming and share how much her music means to them. The bright lights that we just know are out there. Guy and Charles.

We are, indeed, surrounded by good angels, more than I can name or count. We would not be here were it not for the people who catch us when we were falling, the voices of encouragement that cheer when we consider stopping, the many, many people who stand with us in the storm and whisper, “How can I help?”

Beacons. Warming fires on the hill. They are all around us – all the time – and we are more than grateful for their bright light, infusing us with courage as we sail into the next unknown.

Adrift/Blueprint For My Soul © 1997 Kerri Sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes or streaming on Pandora and iHeart Radio

read Kerri’s blogpost about THE LIGHTHOUSE

like. share. support. comment. Thanks.

Play With Life [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

On my list of things to think about: raindrops are water held together by surface tension. The elements of air and water at play. And then, as if that were not enough, there’s refraction!

Now you know why I’m such a bore at parties. While everyone else discusses recipes or the antics of their children, I’m captured by the drip of water on the houseplant. Talk to me at your own risk.

It’s a question of attractions. Water molecules like hanging out with other water molecules more than they like hanging out with air molecules. Like seeks like. The liquid contracts. An inward force of attraction creates a surface tension at the crossroads with air. Don’t worry. Beyond the metaphor I don’t really understand it, either.

In my next life I’m going to be either a gospel singer or a physicist. If a physicist, I’ll still be an outrageous bore at parties but at least I’ll understand the forces behind what I’m seeing. If a gospel singer, I’ll be great fun at parties and I won’t for a moment think of the forces at play. I’ll sing with the power of unquestioned faith.

Our backyard is a sanctuary. The birds love it. The chipmunks race along the fence line. The bunnies eat the grass and lead Dogga on wild-bunny-chases. The pond gurgles. The plants thrive. All are interfaces of forces. Water and air. Life playing with life.

It gives me plenty of fodder to think about. And, plenty to love.

read Kerri’s blogpost about HOSTA

like it. share it. support it. comment on it. we appreciate it. truly.

Light Ten Candles [on Two Artists Tuesday]

I never tire of telling this story. 4th of July, 2013, Kerri and I walked through the festival booths and carnival rides, we avoided the stages where bands were covering well-known tunes, we passed the pie-eating contest, and stopped at the jumping dog competition. Dogs running and leaping through the air into a big pool of water. Doggie long jump.

While we watched the antics, we talked of someday having a dog of our own. We dreamed that our dog would be black – only a black dog for us – and we’d name it Earl. Or Erle. It is our shared middle name so it seemed only natural to give the pup the family name. Little did we know, on that day, I imagine at that precise moment, our Tripper-Dog-Dog-Dog was born. Dogga is a 4th of July pooch.

Three months later, driving the moving van loaded with my worldly possessions across the country, just after entering Wisconsin, we passed a sign that said, “Aussie pups.” We weren’t ready for a dog. I told Kerri that I thought it would be safe to look since Aussies are never black. We flipped the van around, drove up the long farm driveway, jumped out and greeted farmer Don. “We’d love to see the puppies!’ we chimed in unison.

“Well, I only have one left,” he said, “And no one wants him because he’s black.”

I think it was the first time that Kerri punched my shoulder and gave me that look.

And, although we weren’t ready, I can’t imagine life without our black dog that refused to answer to the name Earle. He’s as quirky and complex as we are, more sensitive if that is possible. He taught us what to call him, the first on a long list of lessons he’s had to teach us.

Today we light ten candles on the Dogga cake. We celebrate the best u-turn we ever made. We toast our willingness to take the leap before being ready. Our life together is made infinitely richer for it. Now, who wants cake?

read Kerri’s blogpost about DOGGA BIRTHDAY

like it. share it. comment. buyusacoffee.com. many thanks.

Embrace The Nincompoop [on Merely A Thought Monday]

I always appreciate when life lessons come in different forms and from multiple directions. The first time I remember hearing this lesson was standing on a street corner in San Francisco with Quinn. He pointed to the tippy top of the TransAmerica building and told me that the person sitting in the big office up there was making it up, too. Just like me. No one really knows what they are doing.

It was a message that actually scared me to death. At the time I thought everyone knew what they were doing except me. I was, in my mind, the only nincompoop in the herd. To entertain the idea that the entire herd was comprised of nincompoops… I wish I’d asked Quinn the obvious next question: If we’re all stumbling in the dark, whose driving this car, anyway?

The lesson came around again, this time while indulging in one of our favorite quirks. Before sleep, we watch hiking videos on YouTube. A recent favorite is Jack Keogh’s, Walking on A Dream. Early in his PCT through-hike, he comments that, without exception, everyone is new to the experience and just trying to figure stuff out. “Everyone has their training wheels on.” Kerri whispered, “That’s true in all of life.” As she sat up to write the phrase, I heard Quinn chuckling. He had a great chuckle.

I’m working on a special project. I’ve volunteered to copy one of my paintings. yes, it’s true, I’m copying myself. Now, isn’t that a scary thought! Every few days 20 comes down into my studio to check my progress. He scrutinizes the original and then squints at the copy and asks a variation of this question: How did you know how to…? My answer is always the same: I don’t know. I’m making it up as I go.

What’s remarkable to me is the ease of my answer. I have no idea. The younger version of me, the one Quinn took to the city to administer a lesson, thought he needed to know. The younger version of me thought that to be competent meant “to know.” The younger version of me, when asked, “How did you know how to…?” made up some profoundly stupid answers. And, to my great relief, usually the questioner would nod their head as if what I said was actually plausible. “What a nincompoop,” I’d think, meaning both me and the questioner.

I am, at long last, able to fully grasp the lesson. Competency has nothing to do with knowing. It has everything to do with being able to “figure it out.” Shorthand: questions are much more valuable than answers since an answer is merely a single step on the path of a life filled with questions. Questions, like life, keep rolling along. I now know that had I asked the obvious next question, “Whose driving this car, anyway?” Quinn would have answered without hesitation, “No one and everyone.”

There I go again, thinking that life is about getting somewhere. It is, after all, the common mistake that defines the nincompoop herd: we consistently miss the point. No one knows what tomorrow will bring. No one controls their moment, spinning on this little orb as it hurtles through infinite space. It’s best to hold the hand of the one you love, enjoy the moment, make it up together, and embrace life as a bona fide nincompoop.

read Kerri’s blogpost about TRAINING WHEELS

Like it? Like it. Or share it. Or comment. Or buyusacoffee.com. Or all of the above. Why hold back?;-)

Labor For Surprise [on DR Thursday]

I designed the set using a David-Hockey color palette. Rich and vibrant. A gifted scenic artist brought my renderings to life. I was concerned. Sometimes what looks good on paper does not scale well. Sometimes scaling up fulfills the promise. Dreams are that way, too. You can’t possibly know a good idea is genuinely good until you give it a try.

I moved from California to Seattle. When I first arrived in Seattle I took my paintings to many, many galleries hoping to find representation. I was excited to be in a city with a mature art scene. I was ready to scale up my career. The response was unanimous: my paintings were too vibrant. Too much color. As a kindness, one gallery owner suggested that my paintings were appropriate for a California audience but would never sell in Seattle. Apparently the cloudy skies and reputation for rain dampened en masse the local appreciation of color.

I was deflated but undeterred.

After a season or two in Seattle my color palette was noticeably different, toned down. The ubiquitous rain naturally muted my spectrum of color. There’s no telling what will happen when lofty dreams hit the hard work of reality. It’s unpredictable. The labor of surprise. Once I was sufficiently color-muted, everyday, every-single-day for 15 years, I showed paintings in galleries, in coffeehouses, in theatre lobbies, in studios, in pop-up shows…

I left Seattle when I met Kerri. I knew immediately that she was The One. Early on, before I actually moved, as we were driving around town, I wondered if my art-life would survive in this new place. I wondered if it was time for me to scale down. The same rule that applies to scaling up also applies to the opposite direction. It was new territory. My dream had never included the idea of trimming. From this vantage point I can safely say that I had no idea how hard it would be and no idea of the abundant changes – that brought simple abundance – this move would bring.

Yesterday Jen asked, if we had life to live over again, and money wasn’t an option, would we make the same choices. Kerri and I laughed heartily at the money-part. This path has been hard – so far, money hasn’t been an option – but we were unanimous and immediate in our response: I wouldn’t – we wouldn’t – change a thing. This dream was and continues to be a genuinely good idea, regardless of scale, filled to the brim with vibrant color and the hard labor of surprise.

cloud watchers, acrylic on canvas, 20×49.5IN, © circa 2002

My still-as-yet-unfinished-because-I’m debating-the-how-what-and-why-of-my-life-website

read Kerri’s blogpost about PEONY RAIN

if you like it, like it. share it. comment, or buyusacoffee. we love writing it and appreciate that you read it.

Let Go And Breathe [on KS Friday]

We have been slow to reenter life at home. We were only gone for a few days but it feels like months. There is life before the farmhouse and life after. The time away serves as a hard line of distinction. And, because there is now a before, we are finding our reentry a bit disorienting. Nothing is the same yet everything is the same. Unrecognizable because it is familiar.

We are moving slow. We are noise averse. We are reticent to go to the store or drive on a busy road. Too much stimulus fries our wires. It’s as if we are walking through the life we know – we knew – as witnesses. There is a silent accounting: what stays, what we will let go.

Transformation is like that. Snakes shed old skin. Trees drop their leaves. People clean their closets. Letting go creates necessary space for a new rhythm and new rhythms emerge slowly over time.

Sitting on the back deck this morning, the air was still and warm. The birds were singing, the chippies foraged beneath the feeder for discarded seed, Kerri said, “This is the level of sound that I can tolerate right now.” I nodded.

Long ago, when I facilitated retreats, on the last day someone would usually ask, “How do we take what we’ve learned back into our normal lives?” They were changed by their experiences at the retreat but the circumstance of their daily lives remained unaltered. The real question was “How do I bring this feeling of openness and expansion from the protection of the retreat center to the squeeze and turmoil of the realities of life?” There isn’t a single answer to the question. In fact, there isn’t an answer. There’s a practice. There are decisions. What might fall off the list of to-dos? Spaciousness is not magic. Openness is often the result of generosity-to-self. One must slow down to see and hear and taste. Touch takes time. Positive thought takes intention and letting go of grudges. Forgiveness is a choice made again and again and again.

The first day back we walked our trail. We talked of the changes we want to make. The clearing of old baggage. Making space. Kerri stopped to photograph the honeysuckle. I took a deep breath of the sweet fragrance. Nothing more. Nothing less.

old friends revisited © 1995 kerri sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora or iHeart Radio

read Kerri’s blogpost about HONEYSUCKLE

if you’d like to support our blogging, writing, cartooning, composing, painting… the QR code below or the link will bring you to our online tip jar;-)

Accept The Gift [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

Years ago Tom gave me a bit of career-advice that I’m still trying to take: “Unlike most people,” he ominously said, “your path will never be about plugging into life. Rather, you must find how life can best plug into you.”

Joyce, a healer and mystic, got that look in her eyes, and told me that I was never going to pursue a single profession. Mine-to-do was to see into hearts; mine was to guide people to their truths.

These days, their words ring loudly in my ears. In the past 24 weeks, since the start-up collapsed, I’ve applied to over 100 positions. Each morning I open my email and find the latest thanks-but-no-thanks. And, each morning I ask myself the same question: How do I – this time – once again – at this stage in my life – find how life might plug into me? I’ve received plenty of ideas-for-jobs and more than a heaping spoonful of advice. “Seeing into hearts” and “Guiding people to their truths” is not stellar resume fodder, even when it includes owning businesses and fixing businesses and coaching people all over the world and painting paintings and directing plays and repairing broken theatre companies. Those “ways” feel finished.

I’m working very hard to find ways to plug into life.

It was a great relief to unplug from the fruitless pursuit for a few days. To gather with my family, to say good-bye to my dad, to eat and drink and play at a farmhouse that will forever represent the time and place an era ended and a new age began. Sitting on the porch in the morning sun I felt spacious for the first time in many months. Standing in the yard watching the sunset, I was quiet inside. Rooted. Easy.

I hadn’t realized how compressed I’d become. How air-less. The farmhouse served as a gift from my father: take a deep breath. Nothing more. Nothing less. This life is quickly passing. Relax. It will find you.

I stepped into the morning sun and practiced my tai-chi. These words from the Buddha came to mind: “Joyful participation with the sorrows of the world,” The accent is on the word “joyful.”

read Kerri’s blogpost about FARM SUNSET

A few ways you can support our writing: like-the-post. share the post. buyusacoffee.com. comment or question. It feeds when you complete the loop.

Forward The Story [on Merely A Thought Monday]

A Haiku

A new era dawns./A chapter closes, fresh earth/forwards the story.

Bellaruth Naperstack often ends her meditations with the phrase, “…and so you are.” As cousin Kate guided us through the forgotten cemetery on the other side of town, she led us to the gravesite of my great, great, great, great grandfather and grandmother. The writing on the stone was nearly washed away with time. As Kate read their obituaries, Bellaruth’s phrase popped up in my mind. The summation of a life, punctuated by the survivors. The children and grandchildren. The next generation. And the next and the next.

It took me by surprise, this meditation on life. The phrase popping into my head was not a reference to the end of the lives of distant grandparents, but to me. “These are your people. This is your root.” They lead to me. I am the next chapter, the continuation of the story.

“And so you are.”

read Kerri’s blogpost about AND SO YOU ARE

if you like it, then like it. or forward it. or buymeacoffee.com. or let us know your thoughts.

Simply Celebrate [on saturday morning smack-dab.]

I wasn’t there when our babies picked dandelions for her. It was waaaay before my time. I just know how she felt when they did. Price-less.

It’s one of my favorite parts of our relationship. A dandelion is more valuable than a diamond. A homemade card, a painted rock…a story is most precious of all.

We read together. We walk together. We cook together. We struggle and triumph together. What could be more meaningful than a bouquet of freshly picked dandelions and the memories they bring to mind?

read Kerri’s blogpost about DANDELIONS

get this beautiful song here.

smack-dab. © 2023 kerrianddavid.com

fistful of dandelions © 1999 kerri sherwood

if you like it, like it. or share it. or buymeacoffee.com (qr or link). or comment. we delight in hearing what you think.