Posted on September 20, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
“We are fragile creatures, and it is from this weakness, not despite it, that we discover the possibility of true joy.” ~ Desmond Tutu, The Book of Joy
The heart-leaf lay on its side. Light peaked through its cracking surface. I was afraid to touch it lest it crumble in my fingers.
Only a few short months ago it was vibrant green, connected, durable. It’s destiny was -and is – as certain as mine. My surface is beginning to crack. Only a short time ago I felt myself vibrant. I thought of myself as indestructible. I am, and always have been, on my way to brittle.
It is this very fact that reminds me to slow down, to turn and feel the sun on my face. It is my limited time on earth that prompts me to lay on my side on warm grass so I might see the full beauty of the delicate tilted heart. To feel the warm hand that squeezes mine.
Posted on September 18, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
They are easy to miss. Glimmers. They appear and disappear so fast. The first sip of coffee in the morning. The hint of fall on the cool breeze. Dogga snuggles in for a pet.
At a dinner party with friends, Kerri and I caught each others eye. It’s good to be alive. Together. With these treasured friends. A tiny smile of a shared recognition.
We made Joan’s tomato soup recipe. Even before we tasted it, the soup wrapped us like a warm comforting blanket.
We set our chairs to catch the waning sun. Also, to see the hummingbird feeder. “I love them!” she exclaimed as the first tiny iridescent bird buzzed in for a drink.
We cursed Jay when we opened the party-size bag of Cape Cod chips. We cursed Frank for saying that Apothic was a very drinkable wine. “Now we can’t help ourselves!” we giggled, having fully divested ourselves of responsibility, diving headlong into our guilty pleasures.
After an exhausting day, we climb into bed with newly washed sheets. “Oh, god!” I sigh.
They are easy to miss. Glimmers. They appear and disappear so fast. They are abundant, like stars in the night. Too many to count. Perhaps that is why they are so easily overlooked.
It’s an odd quirk of human nature to focus almost entirely on the low hanging clouds, to ball our fists and curse our misfortune. Yet, with the smallest bit of intention, focusing on the glimmers is infinitely doable. It’s like a muscle. The more you exercise your glimmer-eyes, the easier it is to see the sparkles. Even through the clouds.
The unique sound of her fingers tap-tapping on the keys. The comfy anticipation of our morning ritual: sharing what we’ve just written.
[I LOVE this piece, Good Moments. If you never have, give it a listen. It will give you a sweet lift]
Posted on September 13, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
I was a doubter. Over the winter, heavy machinery eradicated invasive species – and seemingly everything else – from the forests and meadows of our beloved trail. It left a wasteland of splintered wood and debris. “It will take years to recover,” I mumbled, saddened.
I was wrong. With spring, new green shoots poked through the mud and detritus. The frog chorus returned with a vengeance to a marsh that just weeks prior had been little more than a scar. Slowly through the summer, the mayapple and coneflowers flourished.
And then there’s the meadow. In the waning weeks of August and the coming of September it has burst with yellows, purples and subtle blues. “Unbelievable,” I utter each time we pass through. Were I a plein air painter of landscapes, I’d spend many days seated on the trail, peering beyond my canvas, dabbing paint in an attempt to capture the riot of color.
The meadow is now my go-to metaphor for the power of renewal. In just a few short months, what seemed like utter devastation has revealed unstoppable regeneration. The wisdom of necessary disruption as seen in nature.
It gives me hope as we stand in the debris of our current wasteland. Just beneath the scorched earth of our circumstance, a vibrant meadow is preparing to burst forth. In a few short months, from this eradication, this intensive stripping of our invasive species, new color and life will bloom. And I will be most happy to utter, “Unbelievable,” in the face of my doubt and share with you the tale of our extraordinary rejuvenation.
Posted on September 11, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
We found a quilted heart. Gently fluttering in the breeze, colorful splashes suspended from a limb, we stopped and said simultaneously, “What’s that?” The truth: we needed a heart lift that day. It was why we were on the trail in the first place. This little quilted heart did the trick.
For me, the story gets better. Suspended from the heart was a note: I need a home. The note included a site: ifaqh.com. We were happy to give the quilted heart a home. We were eager to visit the site. What we found gave us yet another lift. From a simple origin story, people all over the world are making quilted hearts and leaving them in public places for others to find – for no other reason than to bring joy to a stranger, to give their heart a lift.
Simple goodness spreads. Brighten someones day and they will do the same. Read some of the stories written by people who found a quilted heart. They will give you a lift, too.
My favorite phrase on the site is on the About page: IFAQH has had a few minor changes over the years, but our heart is to keep it simple, anonymous, random, and neutral with no hidden agenda. Simply leave hearts in a public place for a random stranger to find to brighten their day…
Simple. Anonymous. Random. Neutral. No hidden agenda. Now, isn’t that a refreshing intention in a world obsessed with garnering accolade and attention!
Posted on September 5, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
“We fought so long against small things that we became small ourselves.”Eugene O’Neill
“On my last day of work, the back wheels of my car won’t be out of the parking lot before they erase everything I’ve worked for,” Tom said. He was right, of course. I was there and witnessed the dismantling. His words were not resentful. They were matter-of-fact. He helped me understand that a life’s work is not about achievement. Rather, it is about integrity of process. Relationship. Bringing instead of getting.
“I’ve fought my battles. It’s time for someone younger to pick up the fight,” another in my tribe of dear-wise-guides reminded me when I was pushing him hard to care. I am a few years down the road now and I understand to my bones his position. I have limited time here. I have (mostly) turned my eyes away from the fight and toward the wonder-of-it all. I have no idea how to paint it so I am reticent to touch my brushes. How do you contain – or try to contain in an image or word – the inexplicable? It’s the artist’s dilemma and I love it.
Sitting on the back deck staring into the pastel sky, I thought about their words. Quiet summer nights are prime for reminiscence and reflection. I thought about the battles I have fought in my life. The hills I chose to die on. The art meant to heal or change or provoke. To reach and touch a heart. To shake a sleeper awake.
I have been fortunate to have had such wise guides showing me the way. To give me the rare gift of perspective. I am fortunate to understand how unbearably small I am in this limitless universe. Were I to believe myself grand I would not have access to the awe of this summer night, this rolling pastel sky.
Posted on August 30, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
We slept on the living room floor last night. Our chugga-chugga air conditioner doesn’t reach our bedroom at the back of the house. Record breaking heat drove us to improvisation. “We’re camping!” we exclaimed, spreading blankets on the throw-rug, Dogga jumping with enthusiasm into our bed-making-attempts, ruffling our efforts.
In the morning, we could barely move. “My shoulder is killing me!” I whined.
“My hips are burning,” she frowned.
We laughed and together howled, “OUCH!” I creaked to the kitchen to make coffee.
While waiting for the coffee to brew I thought of the underpass. On Saturday we explored a new part of the river trail that ran beneath several busy roads, including the interstate highway. As we left the heat of the sun and entered the cool of the underpass, Kerri asked, “Do you think people sleep under here?”
“Yes, I do.”
Standing at the coffeemaker I was awash with thankfulness. I slept on the floor by choice. Our dog woke us this morning nuzzling our faces. Our ancient air conditioner kept us cool through a brutally hot night. We laughed at our aches and pain.
It’s funny the way thoughts tumble and connect with memory, constellating into well-worn images or plowing new conceptual pathways. Udayana University, Bali. One of my graduate school peers had just completed a presentation on homelessness in the United States. The Udayana faculty was horrified. “But you are the richest country on earth,” a wide-eyed Balinese professor stuttered. “How can you let a member of your community go without a home?” To him, it was the height of shame for a community not to care for their own. It was, in fact, inconceivable. This moment was central to my memory: I saw in his eyes the high esteem he held for us fall into the dark basement. He was suddenly very proud to be Balinese. His community might not have financial resources but they had a form of wealth that made paupers of his American guests.
“It’s the contrast principle”, 20 says. Oppositions illuminate. Cultural differences clarify. What we normalize we cease seeing. I’ve stepped over people sleeping in the street. In Seattle, I routinely rode my bike on paths under a freeway lined with tents and shopping-cart-possessions. In Bali, a man stopped his work in the fields and walked with me because it was rude to let a guest walk alone. We did not speak because we did not share a common language. When I reached my destination, we nodded and shared through our eyes that most universal of gratitudes: genuine appreciation for the companionship of the other; an authentic wish for the well-being of all.
Posted on August 22, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
If you want to see me cry, play Lowen and Navarro’s song, If I Was The Rain. There are two versions that kill me. The version released on their album, All The Time In The World. And, the Youtube of Eric Lowen’s last concert. In the hard grip of ALS, he spoke the words of the song from his wheelchair. It is, without a doubt, a triumph of the human spirit. I blubber every time I watch it.
“If I was the rain/ I’d polish every outbound train/ I’d wash the teardrops from your eyes/ so you could kiss the blues good-bye.”
We simply could not believe it. Standing in the sunroom we watched a torrent of water stream down the windows. The gutters were overwhelmed. Sheets of water enveloped the house. It was as if we were standing behind a raging waterfall. It was, at the same time, glorious and terrifying. Beautiful and petrifying.
“If I was the rain/ I’d answer all the farmer’s prayers/ till green was growing everywhere/ If I was the rain.”
We’d just emerged from the basement. Trying to channel the incoming water to the floor drains, we laid towels, we positioned fans. We quickly moved boxes and bags, anything in the water’s path. We laughed and looked at each other wide-eyed. What else could we do?
“If I was the rain/ I’d choose forever to remain/ I’d add a sparkle to the night/ and marvel at the morning bright.“
It’s a new day. The rain has finally stopped. The sun is attempting to break through the clouds. The basement is dry at last. Our towel-river-bank is in the washer, getting cleaned and ready for the next emergency. We looked at photos on the web of the local flooding. We shook at heads at the volume of water that fell. It came so fast.
If I was the rain/ I’d bless each blossom to unfold/ and I’d turn each one of them into gold/ if I was the rain…
The world as seen through a waterfall. Roaring off our roof, cascading down the walls and windows, distorting the reality as we know it. Altering the arc of the day. Neighbors texting neighbors, “Are you okay?” People, knee-deep in water, helping other people because they need it. The best of humanity showing its face, even for a brief moment.
Posted on August 17, 2023 by davidrobinsoncreative
“If I don’t brag I can’t complain,” she said, eyes sparkling. I howled with laughter. Wisdom from a soon-to-be 101 year old.
There’s nothing like a long life to strip the paint off an ego.
Her wisdom launched me into a thought-jag and made me wonder what a little time and maturity might bring to our yammering social media streams. Of LinkedIn a colleague recently said, “Everyone is selling. No one is buying.” Lots of bragging balanced by lots of complaining. Although it is moving fast, social media is still very, very young. A raucous kindergarten class. Me. Me. Me!
Kerri and I are not above it, of course. We are knee-deep in it. Each day we bemoan, “Oh, if only our readers would like or share our posts or music or cartoon or paintings…” The algorithm of “like” makes braggers and beggars of us all. It’s the road to increased attention which transmogrifies into words like “influencer” which promises dollars (with or without sense). (sorry. i couldn’t help myself;-) We don’t really want to be influencers but we do really want our work to support us – just like everyone else – so, a conundrum. In current reality, a full spectrum of bragging and complaining marks the road to increased notice.
Marshall McLuhan famously said, “The medium is the message.” Said another way, “…the content of any medium blinds us to the character of the medium.” Content need not have substance in a fast moving medium creating so many squeaky wheels seeking grease. Character (noun): mental and moral qualities… Through our current medium it is necessary to scream loud. No substance or moral quality is required to garner attention since garnering attention is the end-goal. Complain! Brag! Bang pots! Cry wolf! Blow whistles! Break news! Spread conspiracy! Lie loudly… Thumbs up. Angry face. Heart.
It brought again to my mind the question Susan asked last week, “When did kindness leave…” What I wish I’d said is, “It’s still there, it’s just runs deep beneath the noise.” Kindness has no need to compete with complaint for attention.
“How did it get to be the middle of August already?” Kerri asked, focusing her camera on the fading coneflowers. The day was hot. We were overwhelmed by our tasks so took a break and went for a walk.
“I don’t know,” I replied, trying to remember all that happened in June and July. There were so many life altering events for our friends and family. With no air in our sail, becalmed, time has lost much of its meaning.
Kerri showed me her photo. “I think I’ll call this one Waning Summer.” For us, there’s nothing to brag about so there’s nothing to complain about. Thank goodness. We sit solidly in the middle of the spectrum, knowing somewhere, running deep beneath the noise and moving very slowly, like kindness, runs a mighty river of gratitude.
When it’s humid our refrigerator has an incontinence problem. Upon entering the kitchen and stepping into the latest puddle, we call out as if it was normal, “The fridge tinkled again!” Sometimes I wonder if the neighbors can hear us. And, if they can, do they double-lock their front doors against our madness? Do they pull down their shades as we pass by?
We think we know the problem with the fridge’s urinary tract. We ordered a part months ago that arrived magically through the mail and now sits within view of the tinkling-fridge. It’s like knowing you’re going to need a hip replacement, ordering the part, and setting the titanium hip on the kitchen counter for months until you have the courage to schedule the surgery. “Yep. There’s my hip. Someday I’m going to install that thing…” Our new part has been in view for so long that I no longer see it. I’ve incorporated it into my visual expectations. We’re still working up the courage.
The refrigerator’s incontinence began when the ice-maker went on strike and refused to make ice. We met and negotiated but the ice-maker negotiating team is difficult. We’re having a hard time discerning their demands and are clueless about the original issue. We know the ice-strike and the fridge-tinkle are connected but are somewhat mystified by the humidity-trigger. So, in the meantime, thoroughly mystified but incredibly adaptive to our circumstance, we bring in ice from our beloved the corner market, Morelli’s Deli. We place towels on the kitchen floor.
And what might this have to do with living the good life? “Deferred maintenance is a fact of life!” Kerri insists and she is right. As I’ve learned from our sweet old house, there is always something to fix and that’s what gives our beautiful home its character. And, in the face of the obvious-never-ending-list, the best plan of action is to relax. Do what you can do when you can do it.
This may come as a surprise but, in the face of a long to-do-list, I had to learn to relax. I had to practice the skill of letting go. I’ve had to exercise the muscle of realistic expectations. I was not a willing student at first – I had to recognize that I had lessons to learn! …so many lessons…
How fortunate am I that our house is a master teacher? When you visit, I’ll show you how to jiggle the door. And don’t ask me about the cabinet handles in the kitchen! The first lesson from our house: explain nothing. Smile, relax, and say, “Yes. I know. It appears that needs fixing.”
This morning, while the storm raged outside, thunder and wind shaking the house and dumping buckets of rain, I worked on my website. More specifically, I added a visual resume to our melange site. It’s a map of an artist taking his artistry into the marble halls of organizations…
In the past six months I’ve had several resume reviews. Advice from experts. Suggestions from friends. Modification upon modification akin to rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. This mixmaster of my work history has had one incredible silver lining: I’ve had the opportunity to revisit every era of my career, the passions that drove my choices, the curiosity that necessitated stepping off the edge. In essence, so much thorough review and conversation has illuminated for me a through-line of my life-in-work.
My primary actions? I scatter ideas on the wind. Tom used to say, “You Johnny Appleseed-ed your way across the district.” I’m a consummate cross-pollinator: concepts from the stage introduced to the boardroom. And vice versa. But this most of all: I began this life with so little faith in myself that, over time, I became adept at guiding people to their self-belief; something I had to do for myself so I knew the path. I know the path well. It leads to center.
In the past I’ve been hyper-critical of my choices. They’ve often been less-than-lucrative, made from a different criteria – and have left me vulnerable. Now, from my view in the crows nest, looking back at where I’ve come from, I delight in my journey. To some it looks like the drunken path of a butterfly. To me it’s been a dedication to bringing my gift to the place where it was most needed. I followed the call. Every time. I continue to follow it. Following a calling rarely makes resume-sense.
Last week I wrote about sailing toward the horizon with the knowledge that your questions will only bring more questions, that masterpieces are made by sailing into unknown territory. And, if you are lucky, you’ll come to realize that what’s just over the horizon is more horizon. More curiosity. More experiences. More discoveries. More vital life.
This is the message hidden in my resume: I am unbelievably lucky.
The Direction of Intention 