A New, Unique Personality [David’s blog on Two Artists Tuesday]

It really does not take much to transform a room. New furniture, accent walls or refreshed paint, area rugs…are all viable options. However, none of these work as well or as effortlessly as two googly eyes stuck on the wall. Try it. Your space will immediately have a new, unique personality. It will have an undeniable focal point. It will immediately fill guests with questions. It will, just like your conscience, look back at you. You will wonder what your new room reveals about your personality. You will catch yourself pondering what your room is thinking. Someday, inevitably, you will find yourself talking to your wall.

All of this transformation with the simple addition of two dime store googly eyes.

Keep in mind that three eyes are not better than two. One eye will confuse or irritate rather than illuminate. Eyes on every wall will cancel the magic. If personification is the goal, then two eyes are requisite. No more. No less.

It takes very little to personify, to project human qualities and traits onto – into – something as abstract as a wall. It’s why we find deep comfort in teddy bears or reach for the wisdom of the man in the moon. They look back at us. We endow them with compassion or quietly listen to the messages brought to us by the wind.

Conversely, it takes very little to dehumanize a human being. As easily as we assign humanity to objects we just as easily deny humanity to people. We make them objects. It’s easier to scoop them off the streets and put them into camps if we objectify them, if we downgrade their humanity. If we blame them for what ails us.

It’s simple. All we need do is project onto them our cruelty. Keep in mind, to be successful dehumanizers, it’s especially necessary to avoid opening your eyes. Opening your eyes will immediately fill you with questions about yourself. It will ignite your conscience; you will see “their” eyes looking back at you. You will wonder what your projection onto “them” reveals about you.

It really doesn’t take much to transform a culture. All you need do is close your eyes. It is just as effective to look the other way. It will serve to stifle questions especially the self-reflective variety. Averting or closing the eyes is especially useful when it is necessary to deny the obvious or to endow fiction with substance or abdicate personal responsibility. Choosing blindness you will become an easy mark, effortlessly misled.

All of this transformation with the simple condition of closing the eyes.

Rest assured, in the absence of sight, your community will have a new, unique personality.

read Kerri’s blogpost about EYES

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Make Room for “Wow!” [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

“Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth.” ~ Alan Watts

My inner schoolmarm just marched me to corner where I now sit wearing the dunce cap. Apparently I have been taking myself too seriously. I am confused since I started my campaign for serious-thinking after last week when I was marched to the corner and made to sit wearing the same dunce cap for not being serious enough! My inner schoolmarm is hard to please!

Quinn used to talk about course corrections – learning – as smart-bomb behavior. Rather than “ready-aim-fire” he suggested the correct sequence was “fire-aim-ready”. Too much of life is wasted on the notion of readiness. Live-and-learn rather than learn-to-live.

I laughed aloud when I read the phrase on the wall of an airbnb: “Live your life as an exclamation rather than an explanation.” I wonder how much of my inner air-space has been dedicated to explaining my life choices to myself in the guise of imaginary conversations with others? Why do I spend so much time telling myself the story of myself? You’d think I have nothing better to do and no one else to talk to. I’d much rather fill my inner air-space with a constant, “Wow!”

That must be why I’m sitting in the corner. Perhaps my inner schoolmarm is not so unreasonable after all. She may have something of value to teach me. An inner “Wow!” is the response of someone who is looking out on the gorgeousness of the world. Focus out. A rolling inner explanation is self-absorbed. There’s no room for “Wow” amidst so much “MeMeMe.”

No wonder I currently don a dunce cap and sit by myself in this sad little corner!

Maybe wearing this silly dunce cap has nothing to do with my seriousness or lack thereof! Maybe, to escape my punishment, all I need do is ask, “How can I help?” Or, “Who can I help?” Or maybe I should look out the window at the autumn trees and witness the “Wow!”

Or, maybe I should sit here for awhile longer, invested in the impossible, and continue trying to explain myself to myself.

read Kerri’s blogpost about BE THE GOOD

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Pull The Thorns [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

Matthew and Rumi agree: “You hypocrite! First take the beam out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

 The Buddha is purported to have said: “The faults of others are easier to see than one’s own.”

The message is ubiquitous. The teaching is universal. If you wish to wander in the fields of flowers, pull the thorns from your heart. And, like all simple truths, it’s easier said than done.

History is riddled with the greatest persecutors loudly proclaiming themselves victims. It’s a pattern. Sometimes the odor of hypocrisy is faint. Sometimes it stinks to high heaven. Currently, we are watching this age old drama play out on our political stage. No-self-awareness. Not-an-iota-of-personal-responsibility.

It’s worthy of Aeschylus. It’s a theme that runs through the greatest works of Shakespeare. Othello. Hamlet. MacBeth. Lear. Tortured thorny hearts with split intentions. It’s ever-present because it’s a bear-topic that every human has wrangled. Psychologists call it “projection.”

There is no path to inner peace that does not begin with dedicated self-reflection, self-revelation, and a subsequent healthy course of eye-beam-removal. A good honest look at the thorns carried within the heart before the plucking. What’s true of an individual is also true of a community.

And, if we are lucky and brave and honest, “…at length, truth will out.” A good test of truth is the flood of peace that ensues. A wander through the fields of flowers.

read Kerri’s blogpost about PULLING THORNS

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Hold Space [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

I just realized why the stripped forest is having such an impact on me. While opening the back door to let Dogga out, my dials spun and it slapped me in the face. I am like the forest.

For several minutes, staring at the photograph, writing then rejecting, then writing and again rejecting what I’d written, I decided to get up and let Dogga out. This picture was making me anxious. Moving around has always been good for me when I’m thought-wrestling.

I am like this forest. Exposed. Chips and debris are everywhere. Water is overtaking the trees.

I was writing about a question Justin asked one night at dinner. “What’s your stance about secular Calvinism?” he asked.

“I don’t think I have one,” I replied. Justin’s eyebrows hit the ceiling and I made a snap decision not to follow my reply with an explanation. He was sorting his belief and searching his heart. Empty space was more useful than cramming my erudite-and-empty justification into the moment.

Insight requires space. Lots of space.

I wish I could express how rare it is for me to keep my mouth closed when I have a thought on a topic. Kerri will laugh aloud when I read this to her. “No joke!” she’ll say. I wanted to say to Justin, “I don’t have a stance because I think it’s a given.” His question was akin to asking about my stance on the existence of the moon. No culture sees itself clearly.

No person (me) sees himself clearly.

Chips and debris. The river has overrun its banks. One half of the photo is the result of natural forces. The other half is man-made. Choices. Circumstance and intention. This landscape, once so familiar, will never be the same.

I’ve spent my life cultivating my capacity to see pattern and metaphor. It’s an artist’s prerogative to make the strange familiar and the familiar strange. I am the forest. Familiar, yet completely unknown. Stripped for rejuvenation.

Insight requires space. Perspective requires distance. Perhaps the reason I left open space in my conversation with Justin is something I need do for myself, too. Searching my heart, I am the forest. Stripped of invasive plants I can see all the way to the river. So much space.

What is my stance? Right now, thankfully, I don’t think I have one. I’m holding the space for insight to come.

read Kerri’s blogpost THE FOREST

Feel The Dope Slap [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

This morning I awoke agitated. Restless. I’m blaming my dreams. I know I had tons of dreams last night but I can’t remember a single one. I find it useful to blame my restlessness on something as slippery as an unremembered dream. It prevents any significant self-reflection or responsibility for my unease.

I just popped Rob on the head for diminishing his own work. He’s a prolific and gifted playwright and referred to his latest piece as “…another corpse being thrown on a mass grave of scripts.” After I sent the email-head-pop I admitted to myself that I was actually ALSO popping myself on the head. I used his head as a proxy. Popping other people on the head is also useful for avoiding any significant self-reflection. Although I admitted to myself that my head deserved a good slap, I successfully transferred the impact to Rob. No further self-reflection needed! I’ll wait for Rob to write me back with a return dope-slap. He’s a great friend and I deserve nothing less. Really, I deserve a good slap but I refuse to slap myself. That would require taking responsibility for my actions and my indulgent restlessness is getting in the way.

I’ve known for years that Dogga is a master teacher. Among his many lessons is contentment. And, what constitutes contentment is unique to each individual. For instance, most folks want to find a nice beach to lay on. Not Dogga! His nirvana is found in a deep pile of snow. He’s never happier than when the temperature plummets and the white stuff falls. He can linger for hours on the snowy deck in blissful satisfaction, doing nothing more than appreciating his moment. His teaching method is gentle. Unlike me, he eschews head slaps. He lives his peace, affording me the opportunity to emulate it or not.

The other thing I appreciate about Dogga’s lessons: he has absolutely no investment in how long it might take for me to learn. He is not concerned about whether or not I ever learn his lesson of contentment. His job is to make the offer. He is not concerned at all with the reception.

Perhaps the cure to what currently ails me is a few moments sitting with Dogga in the snow. I think I’ll invite Rob. It’s the least I could do after using his head to slap mine.

read Kerri’s blogpost about SNOWDOG

Avoid The Box [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

When I was in high school a significant teacher told me that I couldn’t do it all. I couldn’t paint AND be in the theatre AND write. She told me I had to choose. She told me I needed to focus. When she said the word ‘focus’ I felt like I would suffocate if I followed her advice.

One day, standing in the back of the theatre with Roger, I realized that I was bored. I needed to take my impulse to the theatre out of the building and off the stage. At the time I didn’t know what that might look like. My pals in the theatre rolled their eyes, made smallish assumptions, closed their doors to me. What I found, what I created, was thrilling. Profound.

The single consistent criticism from gallery folk of my paintings is that I am stylistically too broad. I’m all over the map. It’s true. More than once I’ve been told to come back when I know who I am. I’m not yet able to go back and, at this stage of my life, doubt that I will ever meet the criteria. I hope not.

I have made wrong turns and burned bridges. I have been my own worst enemy and my own best friend. I’ve broken things that ought not to have been broken. I’ve restored things to wholeness that others could not because I understand brokenness. I’ve run from opportunities. I’ve taken ridiculous risks. As MM asked, “What is it in you that makes you run at every edge and jump?” Fear of heights.

Makaela once told me that there was something feral in me. I thought of her the other day when I realized that DogDog was a perfect reflection of me: he can learn anything but WILL NOT walk on a leash. Try and constrain him in any way and he pulls, resists, and otherwise works to yank my arm out of the socket. I wonder how many arms I’ve yanked when I was approached with a leash? I know that once, a long time ago, I was a good teacher because I knew firsthand the power and necessity of removing constraints.

I’ve given away my best work, my best thinking. I have lived my way into utter irrelevance. The layers of the onion fall away. These days I feel more essence than substance. Pure ghost watching a world to which I have never belonged and rarely understood.

Horatio calls me a polymath to which I reply, “Back at you.” I dare anyone to try and track our conversations. The question in life that I have learned to hate the most is, “So, what do you do?”

I avoid boxes. And leashes. Apparently, that’s about the best I can do.

read Kerri’s blog post about DEFINE YOURSELF