Talk Turkey [David’s blog on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

(Bing) “You just got a text” I said. We’d been in the basement all day, cleaning, sorting, making piles of what would go, what to donate, what to keep. There’s nothing like an extended polar freeze to inspire a deep purge of the collected-and-accumulated- stuff-of-life.

She read his text aloud, “Umm…are you guys having turkey tonight?” Our neighbor, John, is a master of understatement, one of the funniest people we know. Bob Newhart dry.

“What? What’s he talking about?” I asked.

(Bing) “He sent a picture!” She laughed, “Oh, my god! We have to go upstairs,” she said, bounding out of the basement.

“What? Why?” She was already gone. “I’ll be there in a minute,” I said to myself. I heard her laugh again and then the sound of the camera snapping photos. Fear-Of-Missing-Out set in. I dropped my broom and galloped up the stairs.

“Come see,” she smiled. “You’re not going to believe it.”

Two of the neighborhood turkey trio were sitting atop the Scion. The third was standing in the driveway staring directly into the studio window. A set up. A blatant appeal for sanctuary. I expected the driveway turkey to extend a wing in our direction. Instead, it raised one leg, tucking it into the warmth of its body. One of the turkeys atop the car pooped. Choreography. An appeal combined with a not-so-veiled threat.

“They must be freezing,” she said.

“No,” I said. “Not a chance. They are not coming into the house.” She snapped a few more photos.

“It’s really cold out there.” she muttered. The one-legged turkey shifted to the other foot. “It’s too cold to stand on both feet,” she said, looking at me with those eyes.

“No way. Not a chance. They’re turkeys. They are made to withstand the cold.” The second turkey atop the car pooped.

Someone is going to have to clean that off the car,” she said, subtly allying with the turkeys.

I slowly raised my leg, tucking it in, standing on one foot. “It’s cold in here,” I said. Two can play that game.

read Kerri’s blogpost about TURKEYS ON THE ROOF

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buymeacoffee is a warm car-roof on a polar cold day, a wind block for the feathered artists standing at your studio window holding out a wing of appeal.

Layer Up! [David’s blog on Merely A Thought Monday]

20 and I are smack-dab in the middle of our annual winter competition: who requires the most layers to stay warm. I don’t mean to brag but I usually win. Okay, I always win. And, since we are just emerging from a polar blast, I believe that, in the past week, I might have layer-lapped him. It’ll be almost impossible for him to catch me now.

In truth, I have an unfair advantage. Kerri is the keeper of the heat in our house and she keeps it just above the frost line. That means, in addition to my base layer, I generally sport two additional shirt layers and a vest. And, that’s inside the house. Sometimes, when sitting relative to the back door, I pull on a fifth layer. Thick socks, Uggs, and my latest discovery – the Buff – assure my victory over 20. He has yet to discover Buffs. Also, he has issues with wearing gloves inside the house. Sissy. He is the keeper of heat in his own house and believes in higher numbers. That simple fact will guarantee my unbroken string of layer-victories.

I’m a skinny guy so I justify my clothing archeology by whipping up the belief that my many layers make me appear beefy. Muscled. Kerri assures me that this fantasy exists only in my mind and offers a different take: I look like the Michelin Man only with a pin head. So much for my shot at macho. I can tell that 20 agrees. When he comes over to dinner he often greets my padded machismo with a slap on the back, laughter and a question: “Are you in there?” he asks.

20 also has a handicap that he’s aware of but for some reason refuses to set aside. He has heated seats in his car. Both of our vehicles are from another era, from the time of the Flintstones. In the winter months, our seats are made of stone and require many, many more layers. That loser is dedicated to his heated seats. He has the gall to mock me and brag about the pleasure and comfort of driving to-and-fro snuggled in electric warmth. He actually sheds layers!

Sometimes I think he forgets that we’re competing! What am I missing?

read Kerri’s blogpost about WARMTH

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buymeacoffee is like a toasty electric blanket for an artist on the verge of frostbite. It could be a lifesaver.

Add More Layers [David’s blog on KS Friday]

As I write this I have my feet under a blanket. I’m wearing three layers of clothes beneath my favorite Patagonia vest and I can say with all certainty, with deepest conviction, that I am not warm. It’s been trying to snow all day. I want another pair of socks on top of the pair that I’m already wearing. Fear not! This is normal winter behavior for me. I am always cold.

The silver lining in piling on layers and layers of clothing is that I look like a bigger guy. Someone with muscle and heft. Also, my perpetually cold red nose makes me look like I’ve just come from the bar. A passerby might confuse me for someone who is raucous and boisterous instead of the meek introvert that I am. In truth, beneath all of this clothing, I am only exuberant in my writing. Corner me at a party or in the lobby of a theatre and I will almost certainly convince you that I am a nincompoop or in a whisky stupor since you’ll no doubt confuse my red nose as booze-induced. I have no reputation to uphold so I’m good with your misperception either way.

Our favorite neighbor, John, rarely wears a coat. He is in shirt-sleeves even when ice is forming on my eyebrows. I envy his inner warmth though my envy is not green but ice-blue. I consider him the 8th wonder of the world since his capacity to thrive coatless in the subarctic temperatures is a pyramid-sized-wonder. His wife, Michele (also our favorite neighbor), recently texted, “I know it’s cold because John put a coat on.” I ran out to see if it was true. John dons a coat maybe once a century. It was true. He had a coat on so as a preventative measure I ran back inside and quickly added several more layers, then dove beneath a quilt.

Kerri called this photograph, “Snow Burden”. I immediately identified with it. “That’s me!” I thought, my teeth clacking. A skinny stalk bending beneath the weight of the cold, cold snow. Leaves wilted, curling and brittle in the frozen air. Afraid to move for fear of shattering. Dreaming of the sun.

This is no joke. Kerri just had the audacity to ask, “I’m-hot-you-hot?” I said nothing, incredulous that she could look at me shivering (though beefy in my many layers) and somehow miss my crimson-red nose.

“Oh, the weather outside is frightful…”

waiting/joy! a christmas album © 1998 kerri sherwood

Kerri’s albums are available on iTunes and streaming on Pandora and iHeart Radio

read Kerri’s blogpost about SNOW BURDEN

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buymeacoffee is a warm blanket for the artists you value who are possibly at this very moment freezing in the snow.

Pile It On [David’s blog on saturday morning smack-dab.]

We’re in agreement about “the news”. Nightmarish. We are in disagreement about the temperature. I go through the winter months adding layers of clothing and piling on the blankets. Kerri is constantly peeling off layers, tossing off blankets. I like the cool night air but draw the line at frostbite. She likes the cool night air but is willing to go all the way to icicles-on-eyelashes. At night we live in an episode of Life Below Zero.

On the bright side, eyes-frozen-shut eliminates any possibility of accidentally glimpsing the nightmarish news. Silver linings sometimes come in surprisingly cold packages.

read Kerri’s blogpost about COLD NIGHTS

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buymeacoffee is an uncanny hot flash of cold wind meant to open consideration of supporting the continued work of the artists that freeze your fingertips.

Watch The Dance [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

It was once a guilty pleasure. After a snowfall, through newly plowed streets, I’d tie on my red Nike shoes and go for a long, long run. In Colorado, the sun and the cold air play well together. Atmospheric sweet and sour. Run toward the sun in the snow quiet. Sensual pleasure. I’ve never felt more alive than during those treasured runs.

Our yard is a miracle of shadow-play after the snowfall. Between the trees and the tall grasses that grow along the property line, the cool blue sways and dances across the ice-white canvas, a visual conversation between limb and wind. It can be mesmerizing. Sometimes it reminds me of Wayan Kulit, the shadow puppets of the Balinese. An epic tale told on the screen of our front yard. The lesson of Wayan Kulit: we are not substance, not really. Rather, we are passing shadows projecting our story onto the canvas of our minds.

The mailwoman told me that she adored bringing our mail during the winter afternoons. “The light on the grasses,” she said, “they knock me out.” We wait until spring to cut back the grasses for exactly that reason. The pink, orange and purple light of a late winter afternoon makes the grasses luminous. And the shadows they cast! A gentle blue waving, aloha! Greeting or parting? Longing or fulfillment? I’m never sure.

Sylvia Plath wrote in The Bell Jar, “I thought the most beautiful thing in the world must be shadow.” Staring out our front window watching the dance, the frigid air and sun at play together, I think she was right. What could possibly be more heartbreakingly beautiful?

Turn The Shield [on Not So Flawed Wednesday]

The rains have come. The light retreats. This is the time of year when we say, “I’m tired. Are you tired?” It’s the lack of light. The coming change of time. “It feels later than it is,” we rub our eyes and sigh.

I’ve always thought of this time as an in-between. Not-this-and-not-that. The leaves have dropped but the snow has not yet arrived. The sun and the wet clouds jockey for position and neither gains the advantage. Were we bears, nature’s indecision would signal that the time had come to look for a proper cave, a comfy spot to sleep through the winter. We are people and the signal is similar: it’s time to pull in, reflect, attend to the inner places, nestle into our bear-dreams.

Many years ago I took a class from an elder who taught us how to paint medicine shields. The exercise was not about the painting or the technique of stretching the skin over the willow, the exercise was about identifying the symbols. One side of the shield was the outer life, the sun. This face of the shield was seen by all. The other side, the inner face, was personal. The symbols were private. The moon. This is the season when the attention to the outer face shifts to the inner. The bear considerations turn to the owl, the lizard.

Just as each season is both a leaving and a return, both sides of the shield are beginnings and ends. Barney taught me that, in the winter, the energy of the plant retreats from the branch and, instead, goes to the root. Rejuvenation happens beneath the soil. I feel that shift in this time of increasing cold and rain, the shield flips. My eyes turn inward.

We huddle in the early dark and tell stories of the year past. We attend to our rest, move more slowly in our expeditions. We decide more often to stay in. We open the bin with gloves and scarves, prepare for a different rhythm of walking. We recount the past seasons, not yet ready to dream of the time to come.

read Kerri’s blog post about RAIN