Are You A Vampire?

image by psychodollbox

For the past several weeks I’ve been having an amazing conversation with Ana Noriega about love. Love is one of those topics that is hard to contain, it is nearly impossible to wrap your fingers around it because – well, because it is not a “thing.”  Our conversation hasn’t been about defining love or quantifying it. Ana has been helping me sort out for myself what is love and what is often mistaken for love.

Many months ago she introduced me to types of relationships that look like love but are in actuality something she calls “vampiring.”  Vampiring happens when people try to fill their emptiness with another person; basically, vampiring is enabling. For me, vampiring is much more visceral and clear than an abstract concept like “enabling.” Asking, “Who is drinking your life-blood?” or  “Whose life-blood are you drinking?” inspires the making of new agreements.

I’m learning that Love is distinct from need. Love is not invested in what you get. It is all about what you bring. Love is more about who you are than anything you do. Love grows in the space between you and the other. I have an image of love like sound waves rippling from a heart, resonating with other hearts so that the sound/love waves magnify and reach ever farther as they grow in vibration.

Ana is an amazing coach and leads workshop groups that explore the universal laws and how they apply in daily life. This is a list she recently sent me – it is from her latest newsletter. Think of this list, not as definitions or rules but as descriptions of something beyond description, of how you might try to describe a sunset or the view from the top of a mountain. Think of this list, not as something to achieve, but as the qualities of an experience:

What is Love?

The cosmic law of Universal Love, ruler of all universal laws shows that:

  • LOVE builds, not destroys;
  • Gives freedom, not denies it;
  • Does not subject to nor subjects itself to;
  • LOVE does not treasure, but shares;
  • It is not selfish, possessive nor authoritarian;
  • It is impersonal, generous and sympathetic;
  • LOVE is not discriminatory or personal, but universal and impersonal;
  • IT is delivered without expecting rewards or recognition;
  • Love does not forgive, because nothing offends it;
  • It does not demand because it has no expectation;
  • Love does not reason because it is a divine feeling rather than a calculated thought;
  • Love is not greedy, because it has it all;
  • It does not criticize, because it understands the divinity of man, respects his wishes and free will;
  • It does not fall into jealousy, because it extends into every heart;
  • It loves all and shares without feelings of belonging or possession.
  • LOVE is protector without discrimination, for to Love, all are his children, mothers, fathers, husbands, brothers, friends.
  • Love does not have favorites and extends itself as a perfect feeling and divine energy that is.
  • Love is God, and therefore is perfect and absolute.
  • It is silent, because it is wisdom;
  • Its manifestations are simple and humble, but sincere and pure.
  • Nothing disturbs Love because it is intact;
  • Nothing extinguishes it, because it is infinite;
  • It belongs to all, because it is universal and cosmic.

I would add to this list: You discover it in others when you first find it in yourself.

One Response

  1. I love the article David! Thanks for sharing!!!

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