The Direction of Intention

20.

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Karola swam out of the mists of time. At least that is how I think of the moment I met her. I was swimming laps  in the outdoor pool at the YMCA early one winter morning in Santa Maria. Steam billowed off the heated water into the cold morning air; I could hear the quiet strokes of other swimmers but I could not see beyond my lane.

I had a kink in my neck and stopped to work it out. “Can I help you?” she said in her thick German accent as she emerged from the fog. She looked like a jolly She-Yoda and laughed heartily at my gaping stare.

Her hands went right to the spot – as if they knew where the pain was and I gave myself over completely to her careful massage. In just a few moments the knot released, I sighed, and Karola introduced herself.

We stood in the pool and talked about the kinds of things that old friends talk about; I was so taken by her that I completely forgot about swimming my laps. When I realized I was late for work  I jumped out of the pool and only then did she say in her She-Yoda German accent, “You know this expression, ‘a glass half full or half empty? You are exhausted with trying to keep the glass half full – that is why you have this knot. Relax. Stop pretending to be things that you are not. You will never experience a full glass until you first let yourself go completely empty and discover who you really are.”

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